By Maria Padhila
I’m afraid I almost didn’t write this. And I almost didn’t write this week because I’m afraid.
I’m afraid someone is going to shoot a photo of my 51-year-old white lady ass in yoga pants and post it to a Reddit page with other photos of women in yoga pants. There are a half-dozen sites devoted to women in yoga pants alone, I understand, but I’m afraid to look at them for fear some virus will take over my computer and I won’t be able to get my work done.
I’m afraid the poster will make chuckling comments about how he shot these photos of women in yoga pants and then went home and spanked it to them. And I’m afraid all his little virtual friends will pile on, and I’m afraid they’ll all make crappy comments either saying they’re going to spank it too, or that they’ll make crappy comments about how bad my ass looks. I’m afraid to make that last honest comment, because you’re not supposed to be offended if a lot of trolls make fun of your ass. You’re supposed to ignore the trolls.
I’m afraid that there are so many trolls: so many people out there with this bizarre psychological twist that makes them so desperate for any kind of attention that they’ll engage in any way they can; people so hurt, so tense, so crumpled and knotted that they’re desperate even to make people angry, make people hate them; people so desperate to look strong, look smart, look superior to the rest of us, just to try to prove they’re alive, that they exist, that they are here.