We have an encore performance from Maria today, but she should be back with a fresh poly/relationship article next week. This article originally posted on Nov. 6, 2011. — Amanda
By Maria Padhila
It’s round about sundown after a hard day’s work, and I’m listening to a nice younger couple talk about dick size. For about an hour. Of course the conversation touches on a dozen topics ranging from gender inequity in dating to the differences between extroverts and introverts in relationships, but the meat of the matter is, well, meat.
It’s the Pedestrian Polyamory Podcast on the Life on the Swingset website, and Shira B. Katz and her husband, Gavin Katz, are talking cocks. Specifically, on this episode, they’re talking about how Shira is a size queen and feels guilty about it, and how Gavin is sizeable (but he’s not bragging, so it ends up just being funny).
She talks about how much she likes that moment with someone new, the “unveiling of the cock.” How interesting it is to slide her hand along his boxers — “and if I’m lucky, it’ll be boxer briefs.” Hey, I wear boxer briefs! I think at this point, somewhat hopefully. And about how she feels guilty at her twinge of disappointment if the member in question is smaller than average.
Through the discussion, she works with Gavin to get to the root of this, and discovers that one component of the disappointment and guilt comes from the fact that her limited experiences with smaller-than-average penises have indeed been disappointing. Not because of the size, but because of how the penis owners handled other situations — for instance, one of them had erectile problems and immediately brought out the “this has never happened before, I can’t understand it” line. As Gavin pointed out, this tactic puts the burden squarely on the partner — it must be something they’re doing wrong.