By Maria Padhila
Tom Daley, an extremely hot and very skilled British Olympic diver, made a YouTube video, very sincerely and sweetly discussing his life, the way those kids and those celebrities do today. In it, he made an announcement that surprised many and touched off an old debate: that he was dating a man (he’s 19 and his sweetie is pushing 40, but that doesn’t seem to be getting anyone’s knickers in a wad) but that “of course, I still fancy girls.”
He is so young and vulnerable in the video, and still so clear about his athletic goals, and looking at his eyes, I could only think about my daughter. Young people are becoming so good about expressing themselves and being open, despite what everyone says about electronics turning them into little robots.
In the video, he talks about the support he’s gotten from his family, and the backlash he anticipates from the public: “Some people might call me a liar,” he speculates. This is true, as ironic as it sounds: by being honest about his fluidity of identity, he leaves himself open to being called a liar.
I remember the first time I encountered anti-bi bias: I was at a drag club, my goodness, about 25 years ago? And the performer was touring the tables, making jokes. She asked a young woman: “Are you a lesbian?” “Bi,” the woman replied. “Biiiiiii?” said the drag queen, her voice as arch as her eyebrow. “Bye-bye.” And she sashayed away, adding some choice words to the effect that such middle-of-the-road phonies don’t even bear snarking about.