Loving — and Living the Questions

By Elisa Novick

There are times when I feel a need to go back in to question my most basic assumptions. The following conversation took place in one of those times. While I do not fully understand everything that comes through, the theme that emerges is one that has been repeated to me in various forms. What I especially enjoyed was that when I questioned God, I was the one who got questioned!

Elisa Novick; photo by Eric.

I’ve always wanted to know what we are doing here. What is all this for? Why this particular confluence of spirit, matter, souls, bodies, emotions, thoughts, imagination, action, limitation and possibility? The combinations are infinite, the expressions as well. And somehow through all of this, we have come to believe that there is room for improvement, change, progression, at the same time as we are told that there is a perfection. Yet while we might be perfectible, we never seem to reach perfection. No resting place, no final moment where it all comes together and stays that way.

There has been a teaching in some traditions that in the spiritual realm there is perfection, while in the physical realm, in these infinitely variable bodies and lives, we have lost perfection and somehow have to find our way back. We worry about what we have done. How could we have messed it up so badly and how come we can’t stop and just do it right, make it all better, just be there for once and for all?

I ask God: Is this, dear creator and creation, some ridiculous quest or is it an enjoyable journey? Does it have any meaning at all? And why do we look for meaning, for healing, to be out of suffering? Why do we seek to be good in a world with so much badness?

Dear Elisa,

This is a good introduction to the questions that have plagued this world. What do you think of these questions? Are they relevant? Do you want answers? Who is answering this question you have brought forth anyway? Why do think there is a God? Do you know for certain?

I never know for certain. I live by a working hypothesis, and certainly there are responses to my questions. I choose to believe these high-fallutin’ teachers because they present a world to me that makes some sense, though not in all ways. It appeals to my seeming higher nature, and I need and want to have a higher purpose.

What if it is all made up?

But then, how would I fit in my experiences, of something pleasurable that I like and want, of doing Spiritual Exercises, of the Godwork, of an internal harmony and satisfaction, even joy, doing the spacework (the Laboratory of Life workshop), being with those trees, channeling this loving information, remembering how much I love people, seeing their beauty come forth. I hold these Godwork Meetings at least in part for healing and thriving the planet when I don’t know whether there is anything to save, since this is all an illusion and only exists for our learning. In USM [University of Santa Monica] they say, “You don’t have to fix the school, you only have to graduate.”

Wanting to be out of suffering, help others, save this planet; am I on track? Is there something else I am thrusting towards as I think and act toward it anyway?

You are right that you are making up something, but it is the strongest movement in your being and that is built into your nature. You can’t think without wanting something to be different.

That is right.

Yet you know there is perfection in a spiritual realm that you can climb yourself into and you’ve experienced that, too.


Now you want a context, something you can explain to people, demonstrate in the classes and you want a theory of everything to fit it into.


What if that doesn’t exist? What if it is all serendipity and there is no meaning?

I wouldn’t know what to do.

Then you come to a dilemma, of never being sure, yet acting as if you know something.

Is it a lie? Am I misperceiving? Lying? Holding sacred something that doesn’t exist? Or am I completely misaligned where it counts?

You are the beloved and therefore nothing you do counts or doesn’t. It is all allowed and your intention to be better, to help the populace on this earth feel better counts. Because it is allowed it matters. Because you are striving and have made that your life’s mission, it counts. It isn’t allowed if it isn’t happening. Therefore you are in the flow and can be happy however you see it.

Does it all come down to: this feels good and this doesn’t? Just like a one-celled creature, moving toward and away? Sensing what is toxic, what is life-producing?

Yes, in a way. It is a built-in mechanism. But you are moving toward an idea that isn’t just glorious, it is rational, real, needed, and not inventoried by many as part of their understanding of these lower realms of creation. You seek an egress to the higher realms and that is correctly done, if imperfectly. This groping, trying on, learning, feeling what works, is a signal-producing system that you can rely on — if you can read the signals, the patterns. And the mystery, the not knowing whether it is the right code or the best one you could use, doesn’t in the long run count, only that you were there and you moved on it.

You are not telling me the final answer to the mystery.

Why would I? Just the being, trying, exploring, is enough. And the outcome will be drawn up eventually into God’s creation-mixture machine to inform the many throughout the universes, of how it worked and how it plays out with these particular set of circumstances.

But that sounds cold, though I know as I write this, I can sense that it isn’t. The human teachers I’ve had and beings like the maple tree and others who have explained things to me about the nature of the universe, are loving, more loving than most people here.

That’s true. It is all love. That is the basis.

So do I tell them that we are here to explore and find out what works best?

Yes, and it will change as you continue to explore, allow this curiosity to continue, to break out of old molds, modes of behavior, to allow creativity to bloom.

It does seem that the just finding out, learning, trying on things, gives pleasure, yet there seem to be forms of pleasure that are lesser and greater.

True, there is a hierarchy of needs as Maslow said, and of goals, that people and some other creatures go through. A change in this structure indicates a new form to explore and so it all goes on.

What about all the creatures for which there is no progression? They live, just being, going through life according to what happens and the need to survive and reproduce. They seem primitive, yet like they already have some sort of perfectedness.

They don’t question or have answers, yet they live according to their nature as an example of those already perfected. And in consciousness they are not moving around or experiencing infinite combinations and so they are the support system, a viable planet supporting life so that it doesn’t have to be reinvented over and again. You can’t fathom their journey that doesn’t include a visible progression any more than they understand your need to change into a higher nature.

They are the ones that haven’t messed up the environment.

True, for this most part, they haven’t, and are affected by man’s excesses and journeys.

Why is this allowed? This limited understanding, greedy exploitation? Is it just the reptilians and the troglodytes? Whoever they are? Another race, another experiment?

They are indeed an experiment gone wild, rogue, and have to be dealt with by those who are growing, changing and finding a voice for themselves.

This is part of this particular plan, this feature set?

Of course, it is all planned and loved. Be at peace, beloved, with the graceful nature that is being portrayed. It is a fermentation process as you know it and will be brought to conclusion someday, without harm — permanent harm — having been taken or perpetrated. But this planet was a foregone conclusion and can be fixed at a moment’s choice by those who inhabit it.


By moving into the perfection, into the light-filled realms, the abuse will cease.

But meanwhile all this destruction, pain, suffering, loss of species…

It is not for nothing. Species can be re-created, meaning and order can be restored. That is why there are so many variables and fail-safes built in, so many means of restoration, a healing process, a re-building necessary and required. Your science is discovering it, more everyday, and making necessary adjustments. People are asking questions.

And the suffering?

It is experienced as real and therefore motivates others to change something. You have this recent opportunity to become more than one-celled creatures become, but without trying things on, challenges to face and overcome, how would that new perfection, creation, come about?

Just release your horror and your suffering will cease. Believe in yourself, sweet one, and the goodness and desire in so many to come forth and speak of Itself and Its divine nature, and there will be changes. A new paradise is possible as a moving, living being comes upon the face of this earth, a creature of consciousness that has tried, experimented, survived, and lived to a great age, with a newfound, hard-earned wisdom, and all will rejoice.

I am seeing some big living blob of something as the earth.

It is going to be prettier than that, dear one.

Thanks. Good to know.


To listen to and read past conversations with Elisa Novick on Planet Waves, plus her articles, please use this link. You’re invited to visit her website and Facebook page.

Elisa Novick, MSS does profound work as a healer, teacher, counselor, coach, minister, and facilitator of workshops and trainings in personal, professional, and spiritual development. She can assist you to clear personal, karmic and genetic patterns that have limited you and teach you exquisite attunement skills so you can become the magnificent master of life and Light that all of us are destined to be. Elisa has been assisting people in their growth since 1982 through her counseling practice and in facilitating over 1,000 workshops in holistic health, human development, family constellation, systemic constellation, organizational dynamics, planetary healing and spiritual awareness. You may email her directly at elisanovick [at] thrivingplanet [dot] org.

6 thoughts on “Loving — and Living the Questions”

  1. “a moving, living being comes upon the face of this earth, a creature of consciousness that has tried, experimented, survived, and lived to a great age, with a newfound, hard-earned wisdom, and all will rejoice.”

    I saw this happening in the sessions, and this is not the only one I saw there is another one too, but it comes from a different plane and has a completely different color, you never asked what I did see all those days you had me traveling, I saw a lot. Thanks for that.

  2. Every time I read your comments, I am so moved — my heart just blooms!

    And for starrynight3, I agree; I don’t know anyone who does not go through those moments of questioning. That is what we do. We want to have all of ourselves line up with our inner knowledge and that is a process. I believe it was a teacher of mine that said, “When in doubt, check it out” meaning that we use all of us, including our intellectual honesty, to lean into the understanding we have otherwise and certainly into teachings we take on from others. Some use doubt to not look, but I’ve always taught and try to live by the idea of being a spiritual scientist. Being thorough can be fun and there is always new learning in the process. Fortunately, those who are working with me (us) in the higher realms are infinitely patient with my questions and my need to be secured. We all need to be secured. That is the tender love that makes it all worth while and is the hallmark of the Spirit.

  3. Thank you for this piece Elisa ..it touches me deeply..I have read and re read and find more each time but mostly it warms my heart.

  4. Beautiful. I live as though God is everything because the alternative is unthinkable. No matter how many glimpses of the truth of this (and there have been and continue to be multitudes) I still question. I still doubt. And so it goes.

  5. Thank you for sharing this conversation Elisa. Your ability to open and sustain such a dialogue is every bit as awe-inspiring as the content. Thank you for helping me to remember. Thank you for changing my mind.

Leave a Comment