Beyond The Teasing Game

Note: the eclipse is actually opposite an asteroid called Sphinx, named for the mythological creature who would offer riddles, not Arachne. Arachne is in Scorpio, but it is not in the immediate vicinity of the eclipse. I apologize for not catching this when I proofread the article for Eric. — Amanda

Tuesday at 5:09 pm EST is the first solar eclipse in Scorpio since 1995. This eclipse is conjunct an asteroid called Tantalus. It’s opposite one called Arachne (in Taurus). And it’s square a centaur planet called Nessus (in Aquarius). Each of these helps focus the theme of this event.

[Note to Scorpio readers, you can gain access to your 2012 birthday reading at this link.]

The last time the lunar nodes (which hint where eclipses will be) passed through Taurus and Scorpio was in 2003-2004. However, as occasionally happens, the cosmos served up a series of lunar eclipses in Scorpio, but no solar eclipses.

Dawn in Blue Studio. Photo by Eric Francis.

Seventeen years is a long time for there to be no solar eclipses in a sign — especially one as close to the core of human experience and consciousness as is Scorpio.

And now at long last we’re about to have one, which is sure to flush some of that rich silt up from the bottom of the river and out onto the flood plain, as well as fear, shadow material and anything else we may be hiding. When there are no solar eclipses in a sign for a long time, the feeling can be like pent-up energy behind a dam, which suddenly bursts when the eclipse happens.

With Scorpio, as mentioned above, this will include deeply personal material related to sex, death and the exchange of resources, including potentially the zones where all these things blend into one.

The eclipse is conjunct a point called Tantalus, an asteroid named for the Greek mythological figure. This is a complex myth, though the presence of this point in Scorpio essentially says to be conscious of anything that has a sexual tease. Tantalus is the source of the word tantalize, and the myth is a story of punishment through deprivation.

Nearly everything involving sex and sexuality comes with a tease, though often not the pleasant kind. Potential partners and existing ones can deprive one another of sex for a diversity of reasons. Many people are attracted to what they cannot have. Others concentrate power by using sex as a lure and then depriving someone of it. Often it takes two to play this game.

One way it manifests is issues around availability. This might be a tendency to play with approach-avoid, which is usually a sign of guilt or shame. I suggest you monitor all the ways you make yourself unavailable and see if you notice a pattern, and can discern why you’re doing it. Are you being defensive? Are you afraid to be vulnerable? Are you trying to get power over someone, or to control yourself?

Opposite the eclipse is a point called Arachne, also an asteroid. Arachne represents a conspiratorial view of life, as well as the stories we tell one another, and the ones we accept. Arachne here is suggesting to be aware of the role of gossip (scandal is a form of sexual repression), and to be mindful of your fear of conspiracies. There is also a reminder here that we are all connected, something that humans live with every day and just as often deny.

Finally, Nessus is in the aspect pattern, square the eclipse. Nessus is a centaur planet, somewhat like Chiron in that its orientation is healing. However, Nessus is about trust, betrayal and the karma associated with these things. Nessus is in Aquarius, the sign of ‘what others think’, though it’s square the eclipse — this is about what you think others think. This could also represent what you take on from society, including the immediate society of your circle of friends, and how you let this shape you. Groups of very nice people can hold people to sometimes vicious, hypocritical standards. Yet for that to work you would need to cooperate, and one way to do that is by taking on the judgements of others, or their perceived judgments.

To end the tease, say yes when you mean yes and no when you mean no. The moment you find yourself saying something other than what you feel, or denying yourself or someone else against your desires, that’s a moment to let go. Sex is not an ulterior purpose, a bargaining chip or a reward. It’s a natural experience of life, and we would be a lot happier for treating it that way.

Chart for the total solar eclipse on Tuesday.

The eclipse seems to illustrate the release of aggressive instincts into something more constructively passionate. There is also the message not to take things so personally. We see this in Mars, the ruler of Scorpio (and thus of the eclipse) in Sagittarius — placed on the Galactic Core. Mars is a personal planet; the Galactic Core offers a wide perspective, even on a global or cosmic level. The GC operates in the background of everything.

One message here is that desire is cosmic in nature. It’s not a moral issue any more than breathing is, and like breath, it represents the forward movement of existence. What contacts the Galactic Core can have an exotic feeling, even seeming to be unattainable, impossible to describe or even feel in the usual sense. When you combine this with Mars, the result can be cosmic desire that’s yearning for expression in a human, physical and emotional way.

Meanwhile, Mercury is also in Sagittarius, in an especially interesting position: it’s square both Neptune and a hypothetical point called Transpluto. This is a message to question one specific lie: that your existence is wrong. This is a lie propagated by religion, for example in the form of ‘original sin’. Going back further into Jewish tradition, we have the idea of an omniscient God who is concerned with every last detail of what we do; the Jews thus invented guilt. If you’re Muslim, you would get the idea that your existence is wrong if you’re female (and there are plenty of messages coming through Judaism and Christianity to the same effect).

The alignment of retrograde Mercury, Neptune and Transpluto is an invitation to question this assault on nature in general and on your own nature. To do so, you will need to stay awake, stay with your feelings and know that self-criticism is the problem and not the solution. When in doubt, open up to yourself first and then to others.

The Moon ingresses Scorpio at 6:10 am EST Monday, where it picks up on Neptune and Chiron in Pisces and makes a conjunction to Saturn in Scorpio. This series of aspects has a clairvoyant feeling — just make sure that if you have your remote sensors on, you are willing to deal with any information you pick up. On the other side, the mix of Neptune, Chiron and Saturn can have the feeling of giving tangible form to your imagination.

25 thoughts on “Beyond The Teasing Game

  1. Marymack… so pleased you found something to work with in my ruminations. I had to draw out the mandala and let it sit on my desk for an hour or so. Fun, but harder than it looks. Respect to the *real* astrologers in our midst!

  2. mystes!

    whoa … what an awesome read for me! I love the november surprise and doesn’t that just fit in with my instincts to just feel my way forward (feels cancerian for me) and leave the ego-stubborness (yep, 1st house! … though really most of aqua is in 12th … my natal merc is on Ascending w/ Sol 3 degrees in first).

    Very profound and creative reading mystes … I am floored and grateful for your insights.

    How lucky and blessed am I that I can actually understand what it is you are saying … thank you Eric and Planet Wavers!
    mary
    ps: happy solar eclipse everyone! I’m feeling y’all

  3. Carrie! Thanks, and it’s so nice to read your comments. I learn so much from you.

    I read a funny joke a while back that said, “A Scorpio will often wake you up in the middle of the night and ask you if you still love them, and challenge why you do.” I think there can def be this dichotomy between absolute honesty and a power issue in intimacy. I admit that. But it has everything to do with my lack of self esteem. Perhaps this is not purely a Scorpio trait though. In my experience on the receiving end of this energy from a Scorpio a few years ago, the push pull dynamic drove me nuts – but I was a willing participant too. I had many opportunities to walk away. Later, I did – we did – but we’re still friends. I sensed that we wanted to have some power because we didn’t have it at some point in our lives earlier. We both were also very sensitive to not hurt the other, which added to the inability to be clear. Sometimes being clear really hurts, so we skirt the truth hoping the other will get the message intuitively. And honestly, it was me who wasn’t listening. Now I’m more interested in honesty and truth, even if it stings a bit. I’m far from perfect, but some things are def more clear with me.

  4. Daniel! You are back! Yaaay! I have missed your posts (and some of that is because I have not been frequenting PW as often; too busy these days).

    Mystes, I don’t have moon aspecting sun but David does; his moon (11 degrees) in Cancer in the 7th is conjunct Uranus (18 degrees) in the 7th and trine his Sun (14 degrees) in the 10th house in Scorpio.

    On a separate note: My astrology teacher taught me that people can live their sun, moon or asc at different times in their lives. I recently figured out why my husband’s actions don’t fit the typical Scorpio male’s; he is living his Cancer moon. The description of a Cancer male fits him far better than that of a Scorpio male. I live more in my Virgo asc (though I still have the compassion and submission of my Piscean sun).

    Dave and I don’t do the “advance-avoid” or “advance-retreat” game. I was unwilling to live that way based on the definition of it by a friend I had back in my twenties (she described her marriage and it was one where she teased her partner with advance-retreat all the time); this game sickened me and I resolved then not to engage in it in any relationship. It seemed so shallow and superficial and worst of all; dishonest. Luckily for me, Dave came to the same conclusion in his 20’s and chose not to engage in it either.

    My mother was (and is) NPD and my dad is self-centered. Sex was a taboo subject at times and too much at other times. I got the message that sex was something to be ashamed of yet I liked it so much I didn’t like that message and kept pressing onward with it despite (and in spite of) that message. Finding several things society taught me to be untrue caused lot of angst for me: men are not always ready for sex, they don’t always want it, their sex drive often didn’t match mine, and they rejected me when I did what they “said” they wanted (which was initiate it without the usual requirements of dinner or monetary attentions/payments). That confused me and made my already low self esteem even lower; I thought, “if men always want sex then why didn’t they want it with ME when I was doing what they said they wanted; offering it no strings attached?” Only many years later did I realize that everything I had been taught about male sexuality was dead wrong in so many ways.

    This eclipse affects me in the 3rd house and affects Dave in the 10th house. Hmmmm….

  5. Thanks Greenstar, Daniel!
    yeah – love and happiness (or, love and a penis, as the old joke goes)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hsU6_eSG4k4

  6. Excellent article, thank you Eric, the first part is set that I’ve lived in my life
    And March on the Galactic Center is in spiritual resonance with the surf on the web at sextile Neptune makes echo for the energetic communication…
    Wonderful News Moon Eclipse to you all 🙂

  7. This is so wonderful. Very helpful. Also, “I suggest you monitor all the ways you make yourself unavailable and see if you notice a pattern, and can discern why you’re doing it.” I was having this conversation with someone close just recently and it has a lot to do with my self esteem and what I choose to reinforce in my life.

    Also, when I read that this was the first solar eclipse in Scorpio since 1995, I thought it was wrong – until I looked it up! I couldn’t believe that the eclipses in 2002-2005 didn’t have one. I then remembered what things I was encouraged to pursue in 1995 and compared it to now. Both were monumental portals into a completely new chapter in my life, of living, of values, of study, everything. The same is happening now, precisely as many of those previous structures are coming down in deep ways. Previous discussions surrounding sex or relationships were met with a lot of discomfort. Now I initiate conversations and also feel heard more about these themes from my family. It’s not always easy but at least its happening. And now I can walk away from something I don’t believe true for me anymore.

    Yes, Huffy, def had issues about not allowing myself joy and happiness until I felt my mom was happy. More, until I felt she was safe. That’s a hard bag I had considering my father and my grandfather (her father). And in hurt my views on a healthy sexual relationships. Specifically, getting rid of my father’s toxic woman bashing, watching my mom heal her own self esteem and sense of feminine power, then facing my own confusion as a man that I could be someone worth loving because I wasn’t “that” which I feared I might become, that I heard about, that I witnessed, and that I witnessed others being fearful of.

    And now I am finally having the type of relationship with my mom I’ve been wanting for a looooong time. Bloody remarkable woman, strong Taurus, protective, and incredibly loving mom. The rock in me and my sisters life. Just a little clingy and possessive, and it takes way too long to change her perspectives sometimes. 😉 But I’m a whacked out scorpion with brooding issues…….

    Love is instrumental though. Peace, love and grooviness.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v07m7J14rYA&feature=related
    🙂

  8. MaryMack, the image that keeps cruising through is a ‘November surprise’ – with your natal jup/uranus providing the energy. That trine seems causal as the placements of Pluto and Sol/Merc are 1) squared to the Eclipse and 2) in fixed signs. So I see the energy in the chart flowing up the trine line, recombobulated by the New Moon (which, being a phenom of opposition), then transmitted back down those 90º turns.

    I don’t know if you are a 1st H. or a 12th H Aquarius. Kinda hope it is 12th, might make for more internal stability and less egoic-stubbornness. Either way, that Pluto in Leo placement has to provide some major yuks – bet you know a Leo or two who pose as MM’s very own personal Black Holes. Or maybe you’ve found another way to capitalize on that Pluto placement. Like opening a year-round haunted house and hiring a Leo to manage it.

    Hop on the flickering insights barreling in from Cancer, let them pull up the black thorns buried between the second and third decants of Scorpio and I’ll bet your idee fixee for this lifetime pops loose. You don’t even need to KNOW what those thorns are. Just trust that they’ll be wiggling loose. [something something… text illegible…] by the end of the month.

    Maybe.

    Anyone else care to chime in? I really am a dork at this kind of thing, but this is what floated to the top…

    Kelly, I’ll look at yours when I get back from a deskbreak.

  9. hey mystes!

    my moon falls in 9th house and is squared sun/merc in aquarius and pluto in leo … also trines my uranus/jupiter in cancer …

    thank you for your throwing in.
    me

  10. Mystes…you are so kind thank you. 🙂
    Natal Moon is on the cusp of the 12th (in the 12th!) @ 24 deg; natal Neptune is in the 11th @ 19 deg; and natal Mercury is in the 11th @ 20 deg.
    Transiting Saturn is conjunct my natal Sun (2 deg) in the 11th
    Natal Sun trines Saturn in Pisces (3rd) and Jupiter in Cancer (7th)

  11. Especially when we are young, some of the approach/avoidance game in sex is simply due to shyness and inexperience…not always simply either guilt or shame. I know there is a fine, fine line between shyness and shame…but there IS a difference. Additionally, where does low self esteem fit into this equation? I don’t see LSE as “guilt” or “shame” but something else … closely related and equally powerful as both but perhaps harder to parse.

    Also, part of the delight for both parties in the courtship rituals we choose to observe and practise may come from the natural inherent tension of the dance, like in a good Tango. Again, part of this is the fine, fine line between the tease and the dance. It all comes down to what is the motivation and consciousness level behind the action(s).

    @Sara and Huffy… me too….for me Mom was deeply unhappy in her self and in her marriage (and still suffers from extremely low self esteem )…Dad was not happy (sexually) in the marriage and sought out a lot of other partners (which probably helped contribute to mom’s shut down). As a child I did not understand these tensions and dysfunctions consciously, but they certainly formed many of my expectations around love and sex relationships. I’m STILL working thru the healing of this generational karma.

  12. marymack, kelly… 2 questions to help ponder this: what house does your natal moon fall in and are there any major aspects to your Sol (trines, squares, oppositions, quincunx, etc)? Me, I’m an astro amateuse , but still have to have more than one stick to play pickup.

  13. always feel as if I’ve broken into a very energized conversation … sorry everyone for not knowing what the thread is here … but … I’m interested in this solar eclipse and would love to inquire as to the impact this might have on one (me) who’s natal moon is the degree of this eclipse.

    me

  14. Yes, same here, Sarah – though in a very different way. My father was a rampant womaniser, and I was sexually abused by my older brother. It’s only recently that I realised it was because he was trying to keep up with my father in some way. For the first time ever I was able to talk to my brother about it last summer. It was an incredible moment because he said that he felt it was the worst thing he’d ever done in his whole life – and I was able to tell him that I had finally let it go and forgiven him, so he had to forgive himself too.

  15. I am so very glad you’re getting the conversation going, Eric. Because sex will out, one way or another. We can run, but we can’t hide.

    And why hide, when it can be such a life-affirming, beautiful, deliciously messy, shared creative and transcendent experience?

  16. The other thing that was all wrong in my family: sex. Wrong on so many levels.

    Roman Catholic guilt; denial of sex and desire; an environment where physical contact between two partnered adults was practically non-existent; contempt, withholding, confusion; violation of sexual boundaries.

    Sex was either clandestine or dirty, or both. Conversation about sex wasn’t even considered. It has taken me decades to start righting some of those wrongs. It can be done.

  17. That great, Sarah! I’m so pleased for you. Thanks for sharing here, very encouraging and helpful for me, too. xx

  18. Yes, Huffy. Me too. My father and mother both. Relationship was pain and subjugation, and no hoping for much else. I don’t believe that any more. Clearing my space and waiting to try it out.

    Hugs.

  19. Your blog today, dear Eric, plus current astrology, has got me thinking – disttracting me from my work. Feel for the first time maybe ever, that there’s a possibility of happiness (on different levels – sexually too), but this is accompanied by a great sense of fear and guilt. It’s almost good to constantly live on the brink as I do, cos that way worse disasters can’t befall me(!). And I was thinking that a lot of it is connected to growing up with a chronically depressed, unhappy mother, who turned to me for support when I was only a child. An unconscious feeling is becoming conscious, from childhood, that I cannot be happy, because my mother isn’t happy – just wouldn’t be right. Wonder if others with similar mums out there have a similar feeling.

  20. Time to uncover the layers of emotions buried deep deep down below: sexual and otherwise. My natal moon in the 12th is an exact conjunction to this eclipse.

  21. Thanks for this wonderful piece, Eric. Great synchronicity, again, with Sarah’s reading.
    “Yet for that to work you would need to cooperate, and one way to do that is by taking on the judgements of others, or their perceived judgments”. This has come up very strongly for me in these days – along with a feeling of intense self-criticism (never far away), your words really help me to work with it.
    Look forward to checking out the interview, though will be a while – heavy week ahead.

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