Today is Thursday, Oct. 20, 2011. As we’ve been mentioning, there seems to be something up on the theme of conjugal relationships and marriage. In astrology this is showing up as Saturn in Libra opposite Eris in Aries (about seeking our identity in relationships) and the Sun-Juno conjunction in Libra (another image of taking on marriage as a symbol of personal identity). This conjunction is happening at the end of Libra, trine Neptune in Aquarius — there seems to be something gently dissolving about this over-emphasis on relationship as a badge of identity. In honor of this astrology, Comedy Central ran “The Ring” episode of South Park Wednesday night — with the Jonas Brothers and purity rings.
It’s difficult to generalize about ‘the state of relationships’ in society except to say that people sleep with their BlackBerries and iPhones more often than with anyone else. We’ve gone from having virtual relationships to relationships with virtual devices. What’s happening to us?
The Sun-Juno conjunction offers a clue. Juno, being an asteroid, may be off the radar of most astrologers, but it covers the topic that astrologers are asked about more often than any other. It’s one of the most dependable symbols of marriage, marriage partners, and the various rules and regulations that attend conjugal relationships.
The Sun is the primary symbol of self, and of ego identity. This conjunction is happening in the end degrees of Libra, suggesting that a change is taking place. The change is a transformation in the space between self-concept and marriage concept; between identity as an individual and identity as a partner. As the Sun and Juno move from Libra to Scorpio, this transformation or inquiry will shift from an idea to an emotional experience.
This might provide the occasion — for example — to question what jealousy actually does for us; how it actually benefits us and our relationships.
As so often happens, there’s a third party in the relationship. It’s one of the slow-moving hypothetical planets — Apollon. It’s about expanding possibilities; it works as a multiplier. The concept of groups is inherent in this point. So the Sun and Juno are conjunct a point that’s about community. There is the suggestion that every person in a relationship, and every relationship, exists within a wider constellation.
While we use the word ‘monogamy’ a lot, we often forget that every relationship has relationships of its own — and that people are individuals no matter what we try to do about it. This other thing called ‘polyamory’ tends to acknowledge the community, but in theory that also admits the potential for having sex with other people. Don’t give polyamory too much credit for this idea — ‘sex with other people’, meaning people outside the relationship, existed long before anyone ever said polywhatever.
We like to pretend that relationships exist inside not just a bubble but a hermetically sealed container. Then comes infiltration. What exactly do you do about the guy you really like who asked you to go hiking, but you can’t because you have a boyfriend? How do you handle that really hot girl at work who you’ve been checking out for months, but now you can’t do anything about it because you have a girlfriend? And so on.
In fact, the container is not so sealed; at best, the container exists as an understanding, sometimes spoken, sometimes not. At worst, it exists as a charade. But people do exist, and the world around us does as well. What if we just accept this fact, and make peace with our attractions, and with those of the people we care about? For some it’s a big what if — it means completely rethinking who they are. It means casting off many generations of programming.
For others, it’s easier to be themselves no matter who else is around. And at the moment, something is moving that is opening up this whole subject. Something is changing — and it’s happening inside us as individuals first, and radiating into our relationship experiences. Of course, this is happening in the time of purity rings and purity balls and a purity movement in general. They still teach abstinence in a lot of public schools. But bigger things have changed.
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