Editor’s Note: Every Saturday, we run a column by Maria Padhila on a relationship-based theme, usually focused on polyamory or what some call responsible nonmonogamy. In case you’re wondering why we do this on an astrology website, the answer is ‘just because’ — we’ve been on these topics since the very first days Planet Waves existed. — efc
By Maria Padhila
I couldn’t write anything last week because I forgot to be polyamorous.
I’m really sorry about this — for a number of reasons including that I couldn’t write the weekly piece — and I’m trying to get back on track.
A point that comes up over and over when people talk and write about polyamory is that polyamory is not just screwing around. It demands communication and honesty. If you don’t love, which means spending time and talking, you’re just screwing around. And communication and honesty are the things I forgot.
Last week was a race against work and creative deadlines. About the first, there’s nothing much I can do except, unfortunately, burst into tears when I’m longing to write a poem or prose, or just talk to someone who’s not in the world of wonk that dominates the Washington DC area — talk to someone who reminds me that there’s another world, a bigger world. I was also watching the Occupy protests bring to flower a few of the seeds I had planted for years, but I was unable to join in in any way. Instead, nearly all my time was sucked up by writing about, well, corporations and corrupt politicians, because that’s what I get paid for. And I don’t mean investigative reporting — I mean doing writing that makes them sound good. This is the split that is eventually going to kill me or make me crazy, and I’m going to have to figure out some way to stop doing what I’m doing to pay the rent and get paid for what I can stand behind.