Dear Friend and Reader,
Do you remember playing the game where a group of youngsters would form a line at one end of the sidewalk, and one child, who would be the “Mother” would give them permission to take steps, slowly, up the sidewalk. The group would ask one at a time, “Mother, may I?” and wait with their toes curling in their sneakers, and a little butterfly of anxiety hatching in their tummies for permission to be granted or denied. It was all up to the Mother of the sidewalk who went ahead and eventually overtook her. She got to choose.
Today’s aspect is a little like that in the way it combined the heavy, forbidding energy of Saturn with the ephemeral, sensitive, trepidation of Psyche. On one hand, you have Psyche’s vulnerability, the recognition of childhood trauma looming like a great big bogey at the shoulder of the crouching son/daughter who struggled to do everything just right with such devotion that it seems as though there is nothing left but subservience. On the other hand, you have Saturn’s hand pushing and forging a personality that is totally commanding, overseeing every aspect of what needs to be done, which doors need to be crossed on the journey to unification with the spirit.
Isabel Hickey rightly calls Saturn the guardian at the door. When I hear a statement like that, I think of what the guardian Carlos Castaneda encountered on one of his psychedelic sojourns. There was a giant, drooling, vile fly creature that barred him from getting anything but terror out of the experience, until one day he simply decided to accept the existence of the creature. The moment he did that, the monster shrunk down to its normal size: smaller than a house fly.