Greetings and good evening wherever you may be,
I’ve lost track of the intense weeks of news — I count from the leadup to the Democratic National Convention, around when I started taking apart the DNC’s chart with that Moon at 28+ Gemini. (Or maybe the Beijing games, before we knew the scene would be cool.) It’s been another week to write about (and I’m really grateful I did), it’s Friday night and the motorcycles are not roaring down my street. Lately there seems to be a lull when the New York Stock Exchange is closed for business — and I’m feeling pretty good…secluded in my studio with only the blue lights on, listening to Gang of Four, one of my favorite bands of rock artists. Actually, it’s an ironic moment: my iTunes is playing the song “Capital (It Fails us Now).”
I feel in my heart we’re hanging in there. We have a lot to be scared about, and the world as we know it is a fragile place tonight; one that’s being pushed toward the edge of its stress, unnecessarily (unless of course we’re not going to grow any other way). We’re not at that point yet and if we stretch our capacity to move energy, we won’t have to get there. We also need to do this thing called process shadow material. Do you know what I mean when I say that? I wonder if this concept needs a really thorough discussion.
I say this knowing that there are some very, very angry people scattered around the world tonight, whether it’s because a black man is getting full respect as a presidential candidate, because a loved one’s health care will suffer due to a failed investment, or because a personal fortune or job was lost. Or maybe you just feel lonely and you know the way our society is structured has something to do with that. People have been getting angry at capitalism for years, but usually only when it fails them. Plenty didn’t trust it in the first place, but you know we have a kind of Thought Police mentality in this country when it comes to questioning our peculiar institution.
It would be brilliant if we allow ourselves to get closer as a result of this. I hope we have it in us, collectively — that we know we can do pretty much anything we decide to do. I get glimpses of it in the way my readers are writing to me lately, as if they know me. I feel it in the way I relate to the people in my neighborhood in Kingston, NY (a rural city in the hills of New York State) are relating to one another, a little like there is a dome over our few city blocks where it doesn’t rain quite as hard.
Reflecting on the family theme of my writing and my personal relationship developments this week, that feels really good.
On this Pisces Moon,
PS, I see a number of interesting posts in the queue that are scheduled to post this weekend. i.e., please stay tuned to Radio Coven.
Thank you for that, Himmetje. I think everyone is great in their struggle. There just aren’t that many other choices 🙂
~j
Beautiful what you wrote ~j. I felt the relaxation, the devotive capitulation in a way. And for what it’s worth: I got curious about you and saw some earlier comments and I must tell you: you’re absolutely GREAT in your struggle. And even though we don’t always understand each others comments as how it was meant by the writer, I’ve noticed that its very important to see that the way we comment says the most beautiful things about our own perceptions. I have the greatest respect for all of these interactions here. I love your strength, janesdefense.
“It would be brilliant if we allow ourselves to get closer as a result of this. I hope we have it in us, collectively — that we know we can do pretty much anything we decide to do. I get glimpses of it in the way my readers are writing to me lately, as if they know me. I feel it in the way I relate to the people in my neighborhood in Kingston, NY (a rural city in the hills of New York State) are relating to one another, a little like there is a dome over our few city blocks where it doesn’t rain quite as hard.”
Same thing happened to me. I spent all night watching movies with my mom on her new big screen tv, which she bought because she has terminal cancer. She figured it was now or never. We watched the Kennedy Presidency Revealed and Atonement with, you know, that actress who’s had part of her face sucked out.
I told my mom all my stuff. We grieved for Kennedy and she said she had a lot of faith that no one was stupid enough to destroy the world and anyway, as far as our fates were concerned, we/usguys down on the grid were seriously not that important. She figured the Pentagon would get blown up but they’d leave the neighborhoods alone.
I told her that she and my dad looked just like John and Jackie in the pictures and it’s the truth, they did.
My mom never liked how I lived. She had a hard time letting go of us because she was a widow. I knew that. I was the oldest. I left her anyway because I saw the alternatives but I still felt like shit about it. We’ve been fighting since I don’t even know.
Then my brother showed up ( from all things, seriously, golf) smelling like the fancy wine he drinks and the phone started ringing. My mom’s sister, the prom queen who’s also been fighting with my mom for years over generally unforgiveable stuff, is calling with her report about all these other people who have terminal cancer and the various ETA’s for their appearance on John Edwards.
Anyway, I realized. I’m just the weird kid without a dad from southie. The river of us can take over and I can sit here for a minute, and the phone will ring and then my son will need a ride to some girl’s house so she can dye his hair blue (note: hairdying is sort of equal to a blowjob these days) and my brother will get his keys and a raincoat and take him.
And then that unnameable, tentacled animal inside me just relaxed.
~j
‘Scanned this article and John Whitehead uses curious data to arrive to his conclusions. A quote from Congressman Gonzales made in 1994, a Halliburton subsidiary non-bid contract of 362 million for prisons. Whoa Nelly. That wouldn’t pay for the toilets. Clinton’s administration put in over 2 billion dollars annually into new prisons.
More disturbing is the 2007 Bush directive that has authorized the North Command center, but I hear there is a legal challenge in the offing.
The military isn’t going to transform itself into peacekeepers anytime soon, but the buck stops at the Constitution when it comes to obeying illegal orders. And there is a high level of professional honor among that part of our population. If you ever doubt it, talk to someone in the Armed Services about how they feel about mercenaries.
Our local Congressman (Doggett)’s office is working on the Natl Guard vs. North Command question. I’d be interested in knowing if anyone else has contacted their rep?
otoh,
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/john-w-whitehead/americas-shadow-governmen_b_133365.html
you probably already covered this didn’t you? probably when I was away attending a conference? *feels like an idiot for some reason*
Thousands of Troops Are Deployed on U.S. Streets Ready to Carry Out “Crowd Control”
Members of Congress were told they could face martial law if they didn’t pass the bailout bill. This will not be the last time.
http://www.thirdworldtraveler.com/Police_State/Troops_Crowd_Control_In_US.html
yes please give us some more in-depth shadow talk
also if you want to expand on how state’s taking over banks is part of fascism … avaaz.org is promoting ‘buy-in not bail-out’ as a solution, and ‘everyone’ seems to think that is a progressive thing to do, nationalizing things – i mean, isn’t that what Venezuela has been doing with various things, and I don’t think they are of the fascist variety are they?
peace and happy (canadian) thanksgiving