Sent in by Carol van Strum, in our investigative department.

Author unknown…

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, “Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am.”

The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, “You’re in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.

“She rolled her eyes and said, “You must be an Obama Democrat.”

“I am,” replied the man. “How did you know?”

“Well,” answered the balloonist, “everything you told me is technically correct. But I have no idea what to do with your information, and I’m still lost. Frankly, you’ve not been much help to me.”

The man smiled and responded, “You must be a Republican.”

“I am,” replied the balloonist. “How did you know?”

“Well,” said the man, “you don’t know where you are, or where you are going. You’ve risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You’re in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it’s my fault.”

7 thoughts on “Sent in by Carol van Strum, in our investigative department.”

  1. ….I first read, “she lowered her ATTITUDE” – which would be true enough……..like royalty speaking to a peasant.

    Sadly, although the “peasant” has a GPS to guide him, and (barely) majority rule, he still isn’t in a Power boat.

  2. Yeah, Pledge to America – now lemony fresh!

    It’s bad enough having to fight “the insane ones” (i.e., GOP) but now the Blue Dogs are creating obstructions.

    I am really hoping we can hold onto the House by a slim majority at this point…

  6. This is from Red State – the Republican equivalent to Daily Kos, and the founder’s reaction to the Republican’s “Pledge to America”, their plan for the country:

    Perhaps the Most Ridiculous Thing to Come Out of Washington Since George McClellan
    A+ Rhetoric. C- Ideas.
    Posted by Erick Erickson
    Wednesday, September 22nd at 6:47PM EDT

    The House Republicans’ “Pledge to America” is out. A thrill will run up the leg of a few Chris Matthews’ types on the right. As Dan noted on Twitter, the Contract with America was 869 words and this is 21 pages. The Contract told you everything you needed to know about how a Republican Congress would be different from a Democrat Congress after 40 years of Democrat control.

    These 21 pages tell you lots of things, some contradictory things, but mostly this: it is a serious of compromises and milquetoast rhetorical flourishes in search of unanimity among House Republicans because the House GOP does not have the fortitude to lead boldly in opposition to Barack Obama.

    I have one message for John Boehner, Eric Cantor, and the House GOP Leadership: If they do not want to use the GOP to lead, I would like to borrow it for a time.

    Yes, yes, it is full of mom tested, kid approved pablum that will make certain hearts on the right sing in solidarity. But like a diet full of sugar, it will actually do nothing but keep making Washington fatter before we crash from the sugar high.

    It is dreck.

    The pledge begins by lamenting “an arrogant and out-of-touch government of self-appointed elites” issuing “mandates”, then proceeds to demand health care mandates on insurance companies that will drive up the costs of health care for ordinary Americans.

    The plan wants to put “government on the path to a balanced budget” without doing anything substantive. There is a promise to “immediately reduce spending” by cutting off stimulus funds. Wow. Exciting.

    There is a plan to cut Congress’s budget, which is pretty much what was promised in 1994. Seriously? In 4 years did the Democrats really blow up the Congressional budget? No — the GOP did that too.

    There is no call for a Spending Limitation Amendment or a Balanced Budget Amendment. It is just meaningless stuff the Democrats can easily undo and that ultimately the Senate GOP will even turn its nose up at.

    The entirety of this Promise is laughable. Why? It is an illusion that fixates on stuff the GOP already should be doing while not daring to touch on stuff that will have any meaningful longterm effects on the size and scope of the federal government.

    This document proves the GOP is more focused on the acquisition of power than the advocacy of long term sound public policy. All the good stuff in it is stuff we expect them to do. What is not in it is more than a little telling that the House GOP has not learned much of anything from 2006.

    I will vote Republican in November of 2010. But I will not carry their stagnant water.

    Comment by Daily Kos:
    http://www.redstate.com/…

    Ummm…Mr. Erickson…if you’re voting Republican in November after completely disemboweling their new plan, you are indeed carrying their “stagnant water.” You’re just completely clueless and dishonest.

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