The Yes Men just sent out this press release. Seems like Andy is fine after spending a day in the clink — specifically, The Tombs, New York City’s famous central lockup. These whacks tried to take the UN by way of the East River, floating in…video above gives details. No police officers were hurt when they tried to apprehend the creatures. Apparently Andy was arrested (as opposed to ticketed) because he had an unpaid ticket for bicycle riding through Washington Square Park. Good thing those routine roundups of SurvivaBalls catch bicycle scofflaws.
September 24, 2009
YES MEN HONCHO SPRUNG FROM CLINK
“Balls Across America” direct-action campaign launched; cop lies but it doesn’t works so well
Contact: The Yes Men event@theyesmen.org
Andy Bichlbaum, co-founder of activist group the Yes Men, emerged after 26 hours in New York City’s central lockup with all charges against him dismissed.[1]
“The judge just laughed,” said Bichlbaum. “The police had a less well-developed sense of humor – and, it turned out, much less regard for the law. But all in all, I’m ecstatic that they arrested me.”
At 10am Tuesday, Bichlbaum was arrested and charged with trespassing, after he and 21 “Survivaballs” [2] gathered on New York City’s East River and announced they were to going to “take the UN by storm” from the water, since all the land approaches were sealed. Once at the UN, they would supposedly use the Survivaballs to blockade the negotiations and refuse to let world leaders leave the room until they’d agreed on sweeping cuts in greenhouse gas emissions, as Secretary-General Ban Ki-Moon has demanded.[3]
The event was a “scenic and mediagenic way to call attention to what our leaders need to do in the run-up to Copenhagen,” said Bichlbaum. [4] It was also the official inauguration of the Yes Men’s “Balls Across America” series of civil disobedience actions, inspired by the call for direct action on climate change by website http://BeyondTalk.net <http://BeyondTalk.net> .
Minutes after the balls began wading into the water, law enforcement swooped in on the protesters by land, sea, and air. In order not to harm their attackers, the balls admitted defeat and waddled out of the water and off the beach. Seven participants were given tickets for trespassing, and one-ringleader Bichlbaum – was whisked away to “the Tombs,” New York’s central processing facility at 100 Centre Street, due to an unpaid ticket for bicycle riding through Washington Square Park.
Bichlbaum’s arrest led to hilarious prime-time coverage on CNN.[5]
“Sleeping on concrete was a challenge, but I met a lot of interesting people, and my arrest meant major prime-time news coverage we wouldn’t have otherwise had,” said Bichlbaum. “That’s the whole point of civil
disobedience. Thanks to my momentary discomfort, our symbol of the stupidity of not taking action on climate change was seen by tens of millions of people. It all worked out great, and I remain grateful to the NYPD for having accidentally made our event successful beyond our wildest dreams.”
Despite Bichlbaum’s gratitude, one thing stuck out for his attorney, Wylie Stecklow: in filing his report, the arresting officer had lied through his teeth.
“The officer said he’d seen Bichlbaum jump over the fence, which was obviously impossible, since the police arrived after the Survivaballs had all entered the beach,” said Stecklow, who defended Bichlbaum at his
arraignment yesterday morning. “And the officer said there were prominent signs posted to the effect that entering was forbidden – also untrue.” [6]
“Perhaps the NYPD thought that if an officer did not swear that he saw Andy climb a fence, and that there were signs providing notice that this area was off-limits, a judge might have dismissed the case,” said Stecklow.
According to Stecklow, officers swearing to facts they couldn’t possibly know is an all-too-common occurrence. “Often, during mass arrests, we see a Supervising Officer assigning junior officers to write up the paperwork. But these junior officers end up becoming the ‘arresting officer,’ requiring them to swear to facts that are not within their knowledge. This leads to constitutional violations and wrongful arrests, and undermines the confidence that citizens should have in the criminal justice system,” said Stecklow.
The NYPD has, in recent years, been found guilty of making numerous unconstitutional arrests in cases of political protest, and then falsifying their statements to fit the arrests. There have in particular been several well-known cases involving the tackling and arrest of bicyclists, with false excuses then written into police reports. [7]
“My case doesn’t matter in itself,” said Bichlbaum. In fact, I’m really happy it turned out as it did. But I hope we can help expose the systemic and nefarious culture of lying within the NYPD, that has had the effect of criminalizing protest in New York City.”
“The police have to be told very clearly that they can’t lie and expect to get away with it,” Bichlbaum added. “The stakes are far too high.”
“We need to strengthen oversight of the police by those who empower them in the first place – you and I, the citizens of New York City,” said Stecklow. “Right now, at a bare minimum, that means giving teeth to the formerly well-intentioned, now powerless body of the Civilian Complaint Review Board.”
“Unfortunately, even when we have video proving police statements to be false, no one seems interested in investigating,” added Stecklow. “That’s got to change.”
After reading the arresting officer’s complaint against him, Bichlbaum decided to file a complaint with the CCRB in order to hold this officer accountable for his false statements.”It’s not much, but at least this guy will have to explain his story under oath. And then next time, maybe he’ll think twice before filing a false statement to make the crime stick.”
The Yes Men hope their next actions won’t depend on police misconduct to make them a success. “With ‘Balls Across America,’ our goal is to get arrested fair and square, all across this fair land of ours,” said Yes Men co-founder Mike Bonanno. “It’s a great way to get attention for a crucial issue.”
[1] Bichlbaum actually received an Adjournment in Contemplation of Dismissal (ACD), which normally results in full dismissal in New York State if you behave yourself for the next six months. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adjourned_in_Contemplation_of_Dismissal <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adjourned_in_Contemplation_of_Dismissal> ).
[2] The Survivaball (http://survivaball.com <http://survivaball.com> ) made its first appearance in 2006, when “Halliburton representatives” attended a conference on catastrophic climate change and demonstrated the functionality of the large inflatable suits which keep corporate managers safe from global warming (http://theyesmen.org/hijinks/survivaball <http://theyesmen.org/hijinks/survivaball> ). That hoax, and many more like it, are documented in the new award-winning documentary film, The Yes Men Fix the World (http://www.theyesmenfixtheworld.com <http://www.theyesmenfixtheworld.com> ), which opens theatrically in New York October 7, before opening nationally October 23.
[3] http://nypost-se.com/news/un-chief-world-heading-for-climate-abyss/ <http://nypost-se.com/news/un-chief-world-heading-for-climate-abyss/>
[4] http://www.democracynow.org/2009/9/23/headlines#14 <http://www.democracynow.org/2009/9/23/headlines#14>
http://nypost-se.com/news/us_news/congress-cops-out-on-climate/ <http://nypost-se.com/news/us_news/congress-cops-out-on-climate/>
http://nypost-se.com/news/us_news/crap-and-trade/ <http://nypost-se.com/news/us_news/crap-and-trade/>
[5] http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/offbeat/2009/09/23/moos.survivaball.cnn <http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/offbeat/2009/09/23/moos.survivaball.cnn>
[6] http://theyesmen.org/crimcomplaint715.pdf <http://theyesmen.org/crimcomplaint715.pdf>
[7] http://blip.tv/file/771625 <http://blip.tv/file/771625> ,
http://glassbeadcollective.blip.tv/file/784711/ <http://glassbeadcollective.blip.tv/file/784711/>
Hm. I think we’re looking at a preview of Pluto in Virgo generation style protest here. Nary a “peace in” in sight.
You’re right dude, fact check. I know that shit. I can already smell all the other, it’s status quo. (big deal when the shit stinks but nobody knows how too manage it!!)
All right, I’ll find it myself. Maybe it won’t be some big ass ball suits, but damn it man, I’ll find my freakin’ way!.
I’ll do it my fuckin’ self. One way or another, I don’t quit. Long haul ’til the Universe makes its call.
You’re a good dude, man! I’ll let you continue in your capacity. (Fish are pretty cool, damned opening square.)
Peace, Love, and Happiness
Jere
jlo, you need to learn how to fact check. or to use your nose.
most bullshit is so obvious, it reeks.
Alright, I’ve followed Bergstein for awhile, I’ll jump back through the hoops. (It’s just difficult when you know the b.s. presented to you!) I’ll check the links, (I know I’m missing the fundamental “civics” education. I ditched high-school at sophmore level, “proficiency”, college wasn’t much more fun, dictating assholes, I preferred hallucinogens.”)
I know I need to take the time to invest in legal matters, but fuck man, it’s such a bummer, and others actually have done it in their reality. (I’s just lookin’ for the easy way IN!!) I know, the more the merrier, (I’ll work it ’til I get my contribution!)
Thank You, We’ll get there!
Determined, from the shadows!
Good morning, The Worm, Your Honour,
The Crown will plainly show,
The prisoner who now stands before you,
Was caught red-handed showing feelings.
Showing feelings of an almost human nature.
This will not do.
Call the schoolmaster!
I always said he’d come to no good,
In the end, Your Honour.
If they’d let me have my way,
I could have flayed him into shape.
But my hands were tied.The bleeding hearts and artists,
Let him get away with murder.
Let me hammer him today.
Crazy.
Toys in the attic, I am crazy.
Truly gone fishing.
They must have taken my marbles away.
Crazy.Toys in the attic, he is crazy.
You little shit, you’re in it now.
I hope they throw away the key.
You should’ve talked to me more often than you did.
But no! You had to go your own way.
Have you broken any homes up lately?
Just five minutes, Worm, Your Honour,
Him and me alone.Baaaaaabe!
Come to Mother, baby.
Let me hold you in my arms.
M’Lord, I never meant for him to get in any trouble.
Why’d he ever have to leave me?
Worm, Your Honour, let me take him home.
Crazy.
Over the rainbow, I am crazy.
Bars in the window.
There must have been a door there in the wall.
For when I came in.
Crazy.
Over the rainbow, he is crazy.
The evidence before the court is incontravertible.
There’s no need for the jury to retire.
In all my years of judging I have never heard before,
Of someone more deserving of the full penalty of the law.
The way you made them suffer,
Your exquisite wife and mother,
Fills me with the urge to deficate!
No, Judge, the jury!
Since, my friend, you have revealed your deepest fear,
I sentence you to be exposed before your peers.
Tear down the wall!
Tear down the wall! Fuck it man, I’m done. I don’t care anymore. I’ll live out my life according to what I think, I don’t give a fuck about anyone else unless they give a fuck about themselves. I’ll work the nature of the law, if I get some insight but, fuck it, I don’t care, I’m a Hillboy in the proper sense, I live by the laws of mother nature, I’ll take care of her first and foremost. (I’m the runner mentality that built up the United States, when we came over, we were just stupid in the fact we couldn’t synthesize our relations too the natives. But that’s reality.)
(This reality almost seems like it’s topping out too dislocation.) (Which is a good thing when you’re fucked!)
Love. Questions? Answers? Conversation? Insight???
It’s easy to get good legal representation when your situation is public interest-related and relatively high profile. Attorneys are likely to be lining up to defend the Yes Men and their issue is choosing a legal team that’s smarter than anyone else’s legal team, and that has a commitment to (i.e, a lot of experience with) civil rights. Lawyers have always taken good care of me for example when I’m involved in an environmental issue or get arrested for covering a story, though I make sure I collect the smart ones, I stick close to the issues, and I keep my house in order. I have typically found organizations such as the ACLU, NYPIRG and the Reporter’s Committee on Freedom of the Press, to be either over-stressed, useless or counterproductive.
The “average citizen” who suddenly finds himself or herself or his or her community locked in an environmental battle is another issue – but most of us get our start working at the kitchen table. It helps to have a knowledge base and good contacts in the community. To have success with any lawyer, YOU have to know YOUR issues and your rights and the history of your kind of case. Just about everything that comes up now has come up before; there are very few novel cases or novel legal theories; in part because most lawyers shy away from them. The higher profile the case, the better. If you seem like the antenna wearing type, forget it. Treat any lawyer like a judge. Make your case to the attorney in a simple, direct and unemotional way. Then you listen to what they say. That’s how you find the right one. But it all starts with being informed and not acting like a wet noodle or a nutter.
There are many ways to get to know your rights, though it takes time to do so. The first way is to read the Bill of Rights. Find the text, and read it. It’ll take five minutes the first time through and an hour the second time through.
Then gradually you get to know some cases that have influenced the application of these rights. The BIG BIG rights that protect us are Amendments 1, 4 and 5. Then there is Amendment 14, which is complex but it is useful because it guarantees equal protection under the law.
Here is a slightly outdated example of that, but it shows you how important the Supreme Court is in making these rights applicable to individuals —
http://planetwaves.net/SexIssue_Court.html
I would note that Planet Waves publishes a civil rights blog called Psychsound that covers these issues regularly, the author of which publishes another blog written about civil rights issues for the legal community, called Wait a Second. The writer is a Cap w/Libra Moon who can play every guitar scale, Steve Bergstein.
http://psychsound.com/
http://secondcircuitcivilrights.blogspot.com/
Understanding these issues is more complicated than making Minute Rice, but once you start to get even the most cursory grasp on the landscape, you have an point of entry. The issues follow patterns. Steve sticks to free speech and employment rights issues. Other people and organizations stick to other issues. For example, there is a resource called RACHEL, which looks at environmental justice issues.
http://rachel.org/
Here is the final edition of Rachel’s – #1000
http://rachel.org/en/node/8421
Quick (relatively) question, where does one find the resources to defend themselves with law? (Generally speaking, a judiciary appointment can order one to pay ‘penalties and assessments’, according to a whim of the capitalism of the Judiciary system.)
Where can I find the law that will protect me as a citizen? (I’m looking for a quick study, but thorough).
Side note, and maybe I oughtn’t be here but, where does one locate their civil rights? (These cats found a backdoor, where are the individual rights incontrovertible? I do know the silliness of that question but, I still believe the back doors are open. Honestly, what I want too know is, Where are the Law resource areas, that will allow me to fulfill my vision of being a self-contained, conscious member of society, who can utilize the system of govt. we have in place, without going nuts, and still allow my vision of Where we ought to be to flow through my vessel, and out into the larger cosmos? Honestly, scrap the last tripe, I’m just looking for Civil Legislation Education. Anyone?)
Fe- we had to repost this with a new URL name, so your comment got deleted.