Dear Friend and Reader:
In tonight’s edition of Planet Waves FM I am honored to have as my guest Tristan Taormino. I first introduced my readers and the astrology community to Tristan a year ago in my article Beyond Astrology, wherein I proposed that she be the keynote speaker at a major astrology conference.
Why? Because in my opinion astrologers need to be sexually literate, the better to assist the clients who come to them with questions about their sexuality. Life is not about squares and trines. It’s about what people live through, and helping them get what they want.
Tristan is a sex educator, filmmaker and self-described feminist pornographer. She’s written a number of books and tours the country giving presentations on what she does. You can reach her website here. In the introduction I mention that I did her chart as part of a presentation on sex astrology in Portland, Oregon.
In the first part of the program, I follow up on the legal representation situation for Dzhokhar Tsarnaev. I read a letter from a reader who was concerned that I suggested that a public defender would not be helpful to Dzhokar; she explains the federal public defense system and how it’s different from that on the state and local level.
Dzhokar will be represented by Judy Clarke, who describes her job as getting her clients to plead guilty in order to avoid the death penalty.
My musical guest is the band Girlyman. “Really good, really unexpected, and really different” is how Village Voice describes Girlyman’s lyric driven folk-pop. But that can also describe the year that inspired their fifth studio album Supernova, available June 19th (distribution through Burnside). No doubt their new CD will be fantastic.
Here is your program in the Old Player. Note, will also be able to download a compressed file of the program on the Old Player page, which also includes a full archive of Planet Waves FM going back to 2010. More recent programs are collected in the category listing at the top of the blog frame.
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With love,
Did you know that Planet Waves offers you astrological readings for every sign in audio format including birthday reports? You’re invited to check out my other products in our audio store. If you’d like experience my weekly and monthly horoscopes, visit this link to access your free trial to our premium twice-weekly astrology service.
update on Taormino – switches decade long position on safe sex protocols, gets attacked by porn industry, Gail Dines not impressed:
http://www.counterpunch.org/2013/09/27/the-hiv-crisis-in-the-porn-industry/
Hey Eric, I agree with you. I will come up with some material and thoughts and would love to send them your way. I am learning and growing exponentially everyday and want my perspective to evolve likewise.
I look forward to hearing a podcast in the future!
Oh man, I feel totally warm and fuzzy Strawberry. 🙂 I think this is an incredible Mars in Taurus themed discussion. Guys are awesome loving giving people. We also have a lot of imposed expectations and pressures to sort through, and when there are sexual performance issues for us, we can’t hide it or fake it. I’m not suggesting women hide it or fake it, but it’s a different “problem” in my experience. And we overcompensate our insecurities by acting out in less than loving ways. I’ve been hurt by less than loving women too mind you, and woman have their work too. But for the record, you nor anyone is fucked up sexually. The moment we change our language to ourselves is the first step to recognizing how beautiful we are right now. And you are beautiful!
Daniel, most of what happens during sex has very little to do with sex. It’s about relating, it’s about one’s inner emotional space, it’s about many things.
If we work together and come up with a list of topics I can do a podcast of some kind that provides ideas to reflect on.
I am not sure your statements about women are generally correct. I am not sure the dialog is on that much higher of a level. I will say that I’ve seen, per the stereotype, that women are more often open to discussions of psychology and tend to be willing to embrace a more complex analysis. But I cannot tell you how many.
I know I kind of tease you, Daniel, but I’m with you 100%. As I work to, as Melanie Reinhart says, “come to a loving relatedness with the masculine principle, inner and outer,” I find the only masculine I know is distorted, with exactly the macho bullshit you’re talking about. I feel like you’re the yang to my yin as I go through this thing of liberating ourselves from the messed-up sexuality patterns we’ve been given. You keep my feet to the fire, reminding me to keep working at the sexuality piece–it’s fucked up, & won’t get unfucked up on its own.
So thanks for your unrelenting passion on this issue. Love you!!
Thank you so much Lizzy!
Actually Daniel, I seriously think there’s a book/blog in there. You write so well about it and you’re so funny, think it would really help a lot of men, too. Eat yer heart out, Bridget Jones!
Sorry about all the mistakes, haven’t had me morning coffee yet!
Great stuff, Daniel! I so admire your candour and honesty, and like Strawberry, you crack me up. Thinks it’s really beneficial for women too to really know how it is for men. Remember the wonderful Joe Jackson song, It’s different for girls?http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fKr2n-9p7WM
Maybe Eric could get you to right Daniel’s sex diaries on here!
When I finally discovered masturbation, i released a lot of fear around male sexuality (and past abuse), and realised that I had so much more in common with men than I had realised. Was a really healing journey for me, on many levels.
sign me up Strawberry!!! High-five!
sorry just wanted to add one more thing: I’ve seen countless woman get togethers about having open sexual discussions promoting awareness and healing. Guys go for beers and yell and scream and hang out. They’ll brag about fucking this one or that one, she was awesome, she was hot, she was a bitch, etc. It just doesn’t exist for guys. They don’t have the tools or the positive self affirmation guidelines that target their sexuality. It’s so frustrating that I get this resistance factor from others suggesting that it’s somehow inappropriate to encourage a guy to become more sexually expressive. It’s like an oxymoron.
In your forthcoming newsletter: Please join us for our Men’s Sex Positive Tea–an exploration of the erection in social discourse”
I get a kick & a half out of you Daniel!
Thanks Eric for a great interview! Perhaps I’ve overlooked or missed it, but I’d love to hear from a guy who is doing the same amazing work for men. I know she is doing a lot for both genders, but I still feel like I’m in a room full or women talking about their needs. Guys are in need of sexual healing and gaining a better insight into nourishing their body responses in intimate settings. I know you’ve written about this which is awesome.
For example, what goes through a guys mind when he knows he’s virile but looses his erection during sex. Do women understand his idea of “failure”? Do they know how to hold space for him? Do they understand how much sexual desire is waiting for release but is held back because of shame or neglect? Does the man know how to articulate his needs in a sex positive attitude.
I understand the need for sex positivity for women, because unfortunately a lot of men are not in a healthy ownership of their sex drive. But I want to see a Masculine Sex Positive interview, or holiday or festival or something! At least a potluck? Tea?
Alright, my 2 cents. Thanks Man!
Just to add two cents: I think Eric’s treatment of this Boston situation has been brilliantly refreshing and cautious–in the face of the epitome of a runaway reaction. Eric’s detached wait-for-the-real-facts journalism is almost unheard of anymore, when twitter counts as a news source. I am incredibly appreciative of his ability to see the situation from an open-minded perspective. If he’s guilty of bias, it’s that justice itself is not being served in this habeas-corpus-free zone our media sources are creating.
My criticism of the public defender system is not aimed at any one person but rather at a system that is largely a fraud and that sells many people’s lives down the river. I said in this edition that I am not familiar with the federal public defender system but that it sounds like it could make an interesting article.
There are hardworking people in every aspect of government. There are exceptions to every rule. There are humane judges, lawyers, prosecutors and corrections officers even within a horrible system. I have — personally — never seen a public defender handle a case with an outcome that I thought was just. I am open to reading cases where people feel that has happened. If anyone has information, you are invited to enlighten me. If anyone can give me one example of an acquittal or dismissal handled by a public defender, you will make my day. If the system works, one should be very easy to find.
The legal system itself — in total — does a lot of damage to individuals and families, and there are hundreds of thousands of people incarcerated and on probation for nothing in the United States. To call that out is anything but mean spirited. I am particularly concerned in this case where the lawyer who will be representing Dzhokar has stated that her goal is to get her clients to plead guilty when in fact Dzhokar or others may not be guilty, or where there may be circumstances that could get his case thrown out. I was not nearly as emphatic about this in my program yesterday as I am feeling.
What she’s doing is caving, in advance, under the government’s probable threat of death, as we all know it’s close to 100% that they will try to execute him. In the process she is waiving one of the most important rights of her clients — that of a jury trial. This to me looks like collusion with a disgusting use of the death penalty as a means of manipulating a guilty plea. How would this play out if there was no death penalty, and therefore the cudgel did not exist?
I just sent you an email, Eric … in reply to your further fuzziness. I’ve posted dozens and dozens of notes here and, really, all of them glowing. I love the respect shown for people of various sizes and shapes, even government workers (as in public defenders). Your tone with me via this post and the emails is not the tone/vibe I’ve come to really love. That’s what I’m saying, Eric. It’s not your best stuff, in my humble opinion. Your best stuff (to me) comes in the form of astrology rather than the topical news … but we’re all different. Were it up to me, I’d have everyone check you out on your other posts. Len’s post yesterday is a beautiful illustration — edification and zero ego. Awesomeness.
Mary
I still don’t understand what you’re saying. I believe you’re an editor; please write out some words that express your point of view clearly, referencing facts. Thank you.
It’s tough getting slammed in the public, I completely understand. My heart goes out to those who are government workers with so little pay and such disrespect from the many. We should all try harder to be kind and supportive … that’s what I’ve come to expect here @ Planet Waves.
Not sure why it’s taken you so many reads to understand. Bias, maybe? 🙂
Why did I have to read this comment three times to understand it?
Recommend others who are here for measured, nuanced, respectful perspective on the stars (and life) do yourself a favor and start the day listening/reading elsewhere … there should be an advisory here: “biased and mean-spirited”
mary