Heyoo,

I had this idea more than a year ago, and the completed survey bubbled to the surface today. I’m posting it tonight just because the world of news has become such a boring, negative place, this is at least 10 minutes of guaranteed fun. The survey is anonymous; it doesn’t ask for any contact data or collect anything from visitors except what you type in. We will, of course, post the results in this space.

Here it is…the first ever Planet Waves Sex Survey.

Dear Friend and Reader,

The 3-D video revolution is happening right now — and no, this isn’t a Daily Astrology and Adventure version of Back to the Future.

The interactive 3D virtual sex simulator.

The technology is improving, not just in the movie theaters, but for our televisions as well. Uranus is the planet of technology and invention. Pisces is the planet of adventure. In the remaining couple of years of this transit, we will see the Fantasy Revolution: developments so realistic and imaginative, they seem perfectly real. Real, that is, in the imaginary sense.

“Last year both the NBA All-Star game and a Dallas Mavericks game were broadcast on a closed-circuit feed using equipment from Pace, the company that Cameron helped start and whose equipment he uses to shoot in 3-D,” according to an article from CNN. And if you think the sports fans are excited, wait till you hear from the porn enthusiasts.

Quentin Tarantino, for one, is stoked, even wanting to direct one himself: he’s just waiting for the green light. Here’s what he had to say on the matter:

I could do an erotic film, I wouldn’t mind doing a women-in-prison or a cheerleader movie. But I wouldn’t cast someone like Gwyneth Paltrow. It would have to be a cool, trampy actress who says, ‘OK, let’s get the cameras rolling - here we go!’

Personally, I don’t see why porn enthusiasts should stick to more standard video techniques when we have something like this in our hands. Why not go interactive? We could go to a whole new level of creating virtual intimacy: holograms of gorgeous people that will appear to have sex with you, without all that messy conversation, touching, kissing, smelling, fluid exchange, emotional risk or intimacy.

Exotic dancers could project themselves on stage and give lap dances without being touched by the clientele (actually, that could be a great breakthrough for the safety of sex workers: put the tips into a slot and strip in front of people that can’t follow you into the parking lot afterwards?)

This time of year, the porn industry could make a fortune, using look-alikes of major electoral campaign figures and their partners, acting out our favorite combinations of sex and politics.

I’m getting carried away with myself…

Dear Friend and Reader:

I’m here with one last report from Loving More East Coast. When most of us grew up, there was straight, gay and maybe bisexual. Bisexual has long been controversial, particularly among those who consider themselves firmly on the queer side or the straight side.

NYC-based sexual civil rights attorney Diana Adams, covered in two entries below. Photo by Eric Francis.

Today we have this thing called LGBTQ — an acronym you can’t pronounce that stands for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer. Of course if you’re heterosexual that doesn’t include you, but at least there is some growing recognition that there are a diversity of sexual orientations and that we need to work from common ground. If we did this acronym right, it would be LGBTQ-Y, since You have your own sexual orientation.

LGBTQ does not include numerous points of orientation: whether you go in the direction of having one partner or lover, or more than one; whether you prefer sex with people you know well, or whether you prefer it with those who are unfamiliar; whether you’re more oriented on others or on yourself. It does not include any of what you might call “shadow tendencies,” such as when someone tends toward monogamy but also tends to find partners who do not.

The word “polyamory” in theory means the option to have multiple relationships with the full knowledge of your partners (and vice versa), but in reality it’s an honoring of relational diversity. (The term “polyamory” means no one thing; it’s is an umbrella term that covers at least 10 different established forms of relationship.)

Continue Reading »

Dear Readers,

As you know, we love hearing from you; to stir up the conversation, we’d like to stage a vote for your favorite image from our daily cover. If you get the chance today, go through our cover archives here and email me at: editorial -at- planetwaves.net to let me know your top three favorites.

Cheers from Dublin,

Dear Friend and Reader:

Human beings are not mechanical devices, but sometimes they sure do act like them. What can I say, we have a lot of diverse potential and one distinct possibility is to temporarily morph into a windup toy. Another is to pop your spring.

People who study neurology and brain chemistry have some excellent, useful mechanical models for how cognition (or the lack thereof) functions, but none of them explain or even begin to sketch the odd phenomenon that is a human being, in total. Neurologists can explain why we can get our buttons pushed by a relative, but not how we came to exist and take up an identity unique in all the world.

Astrology, too, can tell us where we are dragging around the past, but it can’t explain where we came from. As long as we understand the limits of a paradigm, we can work with it honestly and with grounded expectations for what it might reveal.

I have consistently taken a positive and optimistic view of Saturn in Virgo (2007-2009); at the least, I view it as a constructive energy. Mercury, the ruler of Virgo, and Saturn, the ruler of Capricorn and Aquarius, are great friends and they work well together. But then I look around me at the world and see so much stuck energy on the level of ideas; good ideas that take people decades to accept: energy saving, money saving ideas that take a century to catch on; simple, effective ideas about life that could save us untold misery — and people treat them like they are a steaming heap of poo.

I assure you I am not projecting this. What I project specifically are ideas, and I get to observe their effects to some small extent; and I observe the introduction of the ideas of others to the world, and I watch people respond…and I can assure you, most people have a lot of difficulty with new ideas. And with unfamiliar ones. And with simple “common” sense.

Now, the inscription on the plate glass storefront window of my studio, where I’m sitting right now, says, “We don’t see things as they are. We see them as we are,” this being variously attributed to Anais Nin and a Yiddish proverb. So maybe I’m projecting and I am the one who can’t grasp anything new. I admit to being only marginally optimistic about the world, if only out of self-preservation.

Anyway, Saturn in Virgo represents a lot of old ideas. It can also represent a process of clearing away old ideas, as Saturn often makes way for the future and is one of the most effective cosmic fork lifts, windshield wipers or front-end loaders ever created. Either way it amounts to the same thing: we are confronted with a lot of old, wedged in ideas, and we got those ideas not from ether or from eating a plum, but from our predecessors.

Usually we are way too enamored of our parents and grandparents to subject their ideas about life to a fair critique. Or as is more often the case, we are way too intimidated, we feel guilty, we feel like we are literally usurping the power of god because whether we admit it or not, we made our parents into god and goddess as children — with all their faults, their gifts, their wisdom, their backhanding us with the engagement ring on, their sexual abuse or leaving us in the company of a sexual abuser; we hold them as god and goddess.

Much of what we inherit are ideas about sex that go back to Adam and Eve, literally. We are lucky if we’ve cataloged those ideas, much less being versed in them. We are hilariously, famously famous for denying the connection of sex to nearly everything that is connected to sex, though you can’t blame us because we tend to lack the vocabulary, the concepts and the boldness of spirit to see the basic facts and make the connections.

Now we have Mars himself working to break through the jam. Mars is, and is often, the clue that what we’re working with is sexual energy; desire energy in particular, but what I now describe simply as “go fuck the girl” energy contained in the testosterone, symbolized by the cock-and-balls glyph of Mars.

Much of that Saturn is some form of negativity. And I firmly acknowledge we have all been injured by sex, most of us repeatedly. Many of us have no reason to trust sex or sexual relationships whatsoever, and behold, many of us don’t. The number of people who have been sexually abused defies comprehension, belief and credulity. The number of people who have had sex used against them as a weapon, be it physically, mentally or otherwise, is nearly unanimous. And these experiences all add up to a vast cultural and individual database that is popping up just about every 15 seconds or so.

And now Mr. Mars is here to remind us of what is primal; of what is natural and necessary; and to move some of that stuck energy, whatever it may be. I don’t think Mars represents new ideas (Saturn will oppose Uranus later in the year, and that is definitely something new). Rather, Mars represents moving out of the way that which is blocking us, and the agent of movement is desire itself. Desire is an idea, and it’s a physiological force. Right now, it’s talking. Some of us are listening and some of us are wedged in our camp. Some of us who are wedged in sincerely wish we were not here. Most of us have not figured out that it is primarily ideas that are holding us back, or holding us down and holding us to the past.

Most of those ideas come from before our own lifetime; they may be memories transmitted verbally or via DNA; but they are ideas. Here is a clue. I think that somewhere into the high 90th percentile of the population is trying to figure out the difference between sex and rape, and if not that, between sex and masturbation.

Let’s see what the Mars-Saturn conjunction has to say about these topics. I would love to hear your feedback at editorial - at - planetwaves.net (add your own @ symbol in the right place).

Yours and truly,

(from Book of Blue studio in Kingston, New York).

Today’s Oracle takes us to Jan 03, 2003 - Libra - Weekly

Close partners may seem to be slipping clutch plates, teetering on one rocker or acting like that lovely hybrid of creative genius and blazing asshole. Take it with a sense of humor and plot to delay their ski or snowboarding trips for a week or two and everything will be fine. When in doubt, you do the driving. The coming few weeks, anyway, promise to be some of the most refreshing for you in many moons. Remember all you had forgotten about what you want out of life, then remember you probably want a lot more than that today. Actually, while you’re remembering, remember that it’s all up for grabs and that any decision you’ve made you can just as easily unmake. I mean, it’s about time, right?

Wednesday 09 July 2008

Pallas (19+ Taurus) trine Logos (19+ Virgo)
Mercury (27+ Gemini) conjunct Hades (27+ Gemini)
Sun (17+ Cancer) quincunx Quaoar (17+ Sagittarius Rx)
Sun (17+ Cancer) opposite Jupiter (17+ Capricorn Rx)
Eros (25+ Cancer) sextile Admetos (25+ Taurus)
Sun (17+ Cancer) sesquiquadrate Hylonome (2+ Sagittarius Rx)
Jupiter (17+ Capricorn Rx) quintile Chariklo (5+ Scorpio Rx)
Pallas (20+ Taurus) square Chiron (20+ Aquarius Rx)
Mercury (28+ Gemini) sextile Orcus (28+ Leo)
Mercury (28+ Gemini) sesquiquadrate Nessus (13+ Aquarius Rx)

Dear Eric,

It’s about time that I give you some feedback on your excellent work. I’ve been reading your articles, horoscopes and updates for a while now; I’ve listened to your audios and I’m enjoying the pictures on your web page. You really do have some of the most outstanding characteristics a human being can develop - I admire your humanitarianism (a rare trait in our times), your journalistic and investigative skills in addition to the fluency of your writing-style. Please keep up the great work. Who would do it anyway? This world needs people who raise awareness and are willing to take the risk of this challenging endeavour. Oh, I know how frustrating it can be at times, how lonely or even ‘weird’ it feels at times - but let me assure you that your energy has never been wasted. There is no nobler aim in life than the attempt to change the world for the better of it, because ‘all that is necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing’ - Edward Burke. I concluded my latest New Moon report with these words.

– A friend

Dear Friend and Reader:

YESTERDAY we brought up the topic of queer, which is actually not a new topic for Planet Waves; we just don’t usually call it that. Queer means different, and it’s not that difficult to be different when it comes to sex. In fact, it’s the easiest thing in the world — we’re all different. However, many factors, such as social condition to act a certain way, or to seem a certain way, so that people think you’re not a certain something else, influence how people act. The truth is, we’re all different and we feel different on the inside. As my friend Beth once said, we’re all baskets inside of boxes.

Since this is about sex, it might help to take a moment and define that term; we all have a different concept. I mean a psychic, emotional, physical and spiritual conducting medium that helps us celebrate and perpetuate existence. When I say sex, I speak of an exploration of self-awareness and other-awareness. I believe it’s one of the highest forms of communication; but when it’s really working, we create as we communicate.

We all want and indeed need to do this differently, even if the differences are subtle. We all have different things to learn, even if we are lucky enough to find common ground with a partner or partners. More often, the feeling of being different is usually palpable and sometimes it’s overwhelming. And we don’t know how to handle it, usually.

I don’t know anyone who, when you get them in a space where they are willing to open up, does not state that they feel different: than their friends; different than their spouse; different than their family — and, notably, quite often not able to discuss it. And I don’t mean a conversation on the hobbled, agonizing level of Sex and the City. If the real discussion could go to a depth of 10, that kind of discussion to me counts for about .02.

Many, many spouses have exceedingly little in common sexually, and their lives are at the brink of bursting with sexual tension. Yes, there are monogamous marriages that work — but the quality control test doesn’t come back like kids are told it will. We are promised a flawless product, despite the experiences of our parents; we get something else.

Who is the more sexually open party in a relationship often shakes out along gender lines in the way exactly opposite you would expect — women being the ones craving exploration, and guys wanting the usual thing (or wicked jealous that his girl is gonna get laid). So in that case she usually gets her extracurricular excitement through masturbation, which includes a lot of fantasy. However, women tend to live with the fact, more or less willingly, that guys tend to fuck other women. (This basically means that a small few women are getting most of the sex.)

There are also plenty of marriages and partnerships where the female partner shuts down and the guy is left wanting, waiting and masturbating. So neither gender has a monopoly on being sexually withdrawn. Or on depending on themselves for sex. I have not done an official study, but I’m sure that masturbation is the hottest sex that most people have. It’s just not counted as sex! Or, it’s too embarrassing to claim and talk about.

Here is another example of feeling different and being closeted that I think makes someone queer.

And here is one last: a lot, a lot, a lot of people are secretly bisexual or gay inside of heterosexual marriages.

I would suggest that if you feel like this (any of the above), you consider your situation. Why exactly can’t you come out of the closet? There are all the usual reasons. Most of them involve money — that is, there are so many mutual assets held in the context of a relationship, and often children, that you may fear the apple cart may be upset. Someone can’t (for example) have the sex they want, even if it’s available, because of the house they live in or the car they drive. We can see from this how marriage is one of those building blocks that keeps society going exactly as it was going (and why I now feel that monogamy reform, not polyamory, is the first step in our freedom).

Personally, I am involved with both. I have had nonmonogamous feelings since around the 2nd or 3rd grade (sometime around 8 years old). It was simple — I was in love with two girls. That was normal for me. I’m also bisexual, which came a bit later in life (late teens/early 20s). I’ve had some very, very good sex with men. My primary erotic, emotional and affectual orientation is women. Like a lot of people, I find most women easier to relate to emotionally, more empathic and receptive, and more open to my feelings than nearly all men. There is no substitute for sex with a man, so I have to live with this dichotomy, at least for now.

I am an unabashed cunt worshipper. I often wonder what they smell and taste like, along with the psychic impression that comes with the pleasure of giving her that. This response is usually inspired by eye contact or the sight of someone’s face. Fucking women, especially the right woman, is gorgeous and necessary for me. But it is the experience of women from the perspective of being a man that makes me most grateful for being male.

With women, a great part of my erotic orientation involves the practice of compersion. That is, I am closely attuned to the full spectrum of the sexual life of the women who are close to me. It’s not enough for me to “have” a woman in a limited way; rather, I need to connect with all of who she is, including (when appropriate) her fantasy life, her relationships with past and current lovers, and her relationship to me. I live with the truth that the women in my life, including my primary partner, will have other lovers in the future.

Gradually I’ve been focusing my thoughts on polyamory and compersion. Here is an email I sent to Dani Katz, who as you may remember wrote the essay “The Magician” two weeks ago as the lead of Planet Waves Astrology News.

One of the distinctions of monogamy versus polyamory in terms of mindset is that monogamy is heavily focused on the goal of happily ever after; of finding the ‘right person’ and calling it a wrap. This obsession with The One, Forever defines the whole mating dance and many other aspects of life, and it denies the changes that are inherent in life and in death.

The thinking is that you are then relieved of the burden of any mystery in a relationship and in most cases this works out to be true. Often we are relieved of growth as well — many relationships function as pacts not to grow or change. You are expected to be the person you were, the day you got together or got married.

Polyamory, in whatever form it may take (there are dozens of them), is focused on process: of discovery, of communication, of the processes of change and growth and the adventure of the unknown with many more variables involved, and many fewer presumptions. It is necessary to consider different ideas about relationships, which often means considering any ideas at all. When you don’t set an end goal and define that as happiness (such as the search for, and marriage to, The One, Forever), what happens along the way hopefully counts for more.

Think of how ridiculous it would be if a polyamorous person said, “My goal is to have two husbands.” But somehow if makes sense if you say, “My goal is to get married.”

Finally, I am discovering and exploring what I call the third sexual orientation — self-sexuality. Really, it should be the first orientation; if we taught and practiced emotionally grounded masturbation, life would be simpler and there would be less pressure to date and/or marry. Self-sexuality is when someone’s primary sexual orientation is on oneself. It might be expressed through masturbation, or it could be expressed through having sex with a partner that is only minimally relational. In other words, one’s experience of sex is not inherently about the other but about oneself. I think this is the less honest form of self-sexuality, and I think that a great many people (conveniently) use sex as a substitute for masturbation.

In its more honest form, self-sexuality experiences masturbation and fantasy as a conscious journey. From there, both fantasy play and masturbation can be shared by two or more people; the individual sexual journey of each person, their feelings and the content of their emotions, can be embraced by themselves and certain key people around them, and expressed whether solo or together.

Our closest primate cousins, the bonobos, masturbate together for pleasure and communal expression of feelings, and many people have discovered this. It just has not been given a name. When you spend a lot of time exploring in this space, partnersex changes. It’s easier to recognize your partner for who he or she is; easier to feel compersion; easier to make the choices that are right for you, rather than what you think you’re supposed to do.

We live in a time when it’s considered dangerous to experiment. A faux conservatism has taken over, but I feel people getting sick of it: sick of not having options, tired of not being able to be themselves, angry about not feeling safe feeling what you feel, sick of living your life in cloaked fantasy or locked into virtual reality.

For years, I have been calling for a discussion, but I am more lately calling for action: conscious community, open discussion, and a movement to get our exploration going on Earth, not just in virtualty. Action includes coming out of the closet, considering and working through the barriers that keep us from doing so, and on the inner level, addressing our rampant self-esteem issues that prevent us from thinking we have a right to exist. Among the major elements of healing self esteem, I think that satisfying, shockingly honest masturbation is a potent one. I consider it a yoga of self acceptance.

And this all is what I mean by queer — and what I mean by coming out of the basement. I would say if I have a personal goal, it is to be out to every person in my life; to be acknowledged with at least eye contact and a nod for my erotic identity; and to recognize the erotic identity of everyone in my life. This is about witnessing humanity.

With compersion, I get to feel the overflow of the pleasure everyone has, even if I’m not directly involved.

And I want as much good, loving sex as I can get, give or exchange.

I know I’m not alone in this general perspective; this bird’s eye view of Self.

If you’re interested in taking a step in your life and would like to dialog, contact me at info (at) planetwaves.net with a little about yourself (such as what you feel you have to offer to a shared community).

To you, and you, and you, and me — come out, come out, wherever you are.

This is a Sag horoscope from last year; I erased the exact date.

You have little patience for politics, perhaps too little. On our planet, when people get together, the collective power created by the encounter must be distributed. People have a synergistic effect, that is, greater than the sum of the parts. Any group can only hope to have someone in its midst who has some worthwhile ideas about what is fair and what is not, what is necessary and what is not — and who has the strength to stand up for them. Yes, there are honest and ethical people all around, but few give a voice to their heartfelt values. Too few are bold and creative. Too many fear ’stepping on the toes’ of those who step on heads. These days you not only have little choice in the matter of whether to voice your ideas, you also have every reason to speak up for the world you want to see born around you, indeed, a world you can live in and where you are welcome. That world needs you to act — before it takes up a life of its own, not after.

Wednesday 25 June 2008

Vesta (28+ Aries) sesquiquadrate Ixion (13+ Sagittarius Rx)
Sun (3+ Cancer) conjunct Kronos (3+ Cancer Rx)
Pandora (8+ Scorpio Rx) septile Pluto (29+ Sagittarius Rx) - Near Miss Only
Sun (4+ Cancer) sextile Saturn (4+ Virgo)
Eros (12+ Cancer) septile Sedna (21+ Taurus)
Apollo (12+ Leo) semisquare Hades (27+ Gemini)
Venus (8+ Cancer) trine Pandora (8+ Scorpio Rx)
Mercury (14+ Gemini) quintile Mars (26+ Leo)
Vesta (28+ Aries) trine Orcus (28+ Leo)
Eros (12+ Cancer) septile Saturn (4+ Virgo)
Venus (9+ Cancer) sesquiquadrate Neptune (24+ Aquarius Rx)
Asbolus (7+ Taurus) quincunx Pholus (7+ Sagittarius Rx)
Ceres (6+ Cancer) semisquare Sedna (21+ Taurus)
Arachne (3+ Libra) square Kronos (3+ Cancer)