Editor’s Note: The following script was written by Matthew the Astrologer, for his blog last year. Shanna sent it along, and we agreed it was too funny for you to miss. Happy Holidays! –RA
Scene: The Nativity. Caspar, Melchior, and Balthazar gather around the Christ Child. Mary and Joseph listen intently in the background.
Balthazar: …my major concern with this birth chart is that it shows potential for conflict with authority figures. You might want to teach him to be a little more respectful of Caesar, just to be careful. At least publicly.
Caspar: Don’t be silly. He’s a revolutionary, and the world needs more of that. This Jupiter/Saturn configuration, though… could be liver trouble.
Melchior: Look at the stare on this kid. He probably has something we haven’t even heard of yet, right on the Ascendant.
Caspar: (chuckling) You and your undiscovered planets, Melchior. Seriously.