By Sarah Taylor
Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing,
there is a field. I will meet you there.
— Jalal al-Din Muhammad Rumi
Maybe it’s just my ishoo, but I have a hard time explaining tarot to people who are firmly situated in the tangible world — the ones who propound science over spirit, who might describe themselves as ‘left-brain’ instead of right, who talk of empirical evidence and reproducibility, and who often want proof, sometimes demanding it of me with a twinkle in their eye. Oh, and when I see that twinkle, I hope they’re up for a sparring match; they might as well be throwing down a gauntlet and asking me to meet them at dawn. And I can talk all night.
Because for all of the fact that I have a reputation of being — how to put it? — fey (The other day, a friend of mine helpfully told me that I was ever so slightly ‘birdies’ — you know who you are!), I am at pains to point out the utter normality of spiritual life and laws as they appear to me. There is, as quantum mechanics is demonstrating to us, a place where science and spirit meet. Take a look at the movie What the #$*! Do We (K)now!? for an introduction to this concept that is both entertaining and accessible, if a little twee at times. In the same way, there is a point where you and I can meet and talk and find a way that explains our own experience of the world in words that are meaningful to both of us. Words create meaning.
Which brings me to this: I’m not interested in talking in a dialect that alienates people who might feel they are lacking a sense of meaning in their lives, but have no idea where to start looking. I’m not interested in something that segregates people into ‘us’ and ‘them’, those who are ‘evolving in consciousness’ and everyone else who isn’t, those who belong to the new paradigm versus those who belong in the old, those who are going to be moving forward and those who are going to be left behind. In therapy, this is a mechanism known as splitting, where we unconsciously project something undesirable in us onto a suitable — and preferably separate — receptacle, while putting all the ‘good stuff’ in a place with which we more closely identify.
Splitting reflects a state of internal division. As defenses go, it is common. It is whether we are willing and able to become conscious of it that is critical. It is the difference between maintaining that division, which will continue to be reflected in our outer experience, or taking steps to integrate and become whole. We all want to be angels, but how many of us are willing to say we are also demonic? How uncomfortable is that phrase to read, because it was somewhat uncomfortable to write it? How uncomfortable is it for each of us to embrace what we fear? And how often is that reflected in the language that we use and the paradigms of meaning in which we choose to operate?
Instead of walls, I’m for building bridges — between ourselves and within ourselves. Which brings me back to my opening statement: the issue I have about explaining tarot in a way that tries to incorporate rather than alienate. I’ve given up trying to find some kind of ‘unified theory’ when it comes to communicating what tarot is and what it can do, where, as if by magic, what I write about can be understood by everyone. Trying to be all things to all people was a role I frequently tried to inhabit when I was younger, and down that path only disillusionment and madness can lie. Consider the biblical story of the Tower of Babel, or Esperanto. One exploded, one imploded, and both were unmitigated failures in terms of the ideal of universality that they held. Open your mouth, or wield your pen or keyboard with any conviction, and invariably you will piss some people off, attract others, while others still will simply pass you by with no connection at all.
The key word is “bridges” — plural. There are many different ways to skin a cat, and there are many different ways to say the same thing so that it appeals to different people at different times. As a tarot reader, I apply this logic to how it is that I communicate to people who read what I write and to those for whom I do readings. It is no less applicable in any other area of life, however, and I believe that it is a skill that most of us can learn. All it takes is a desire to try and see something from another person’s point of view. When that desire meets with their curiosity — or, at least, their receptivity — then a bridge has been built.
With tarot, these bridges come in the form of metaphor. They have to: tarot, as with all things spiritual (as opposed to material), deals with the ineffable. We cannot know it fully just as our language cannot replicate our emotions, just as a blind man will never know what it is like to live in the world of sight. What we can do is to reach for meaning, to strive for it, and metaphor is the language of striving.
Over the past two years, I have spoken about tarot in terms of travelling, maps, physical sensations, disembodied sensations, psychology, music, mythology. Each of these distinct approaches has its own metaphors, each of them are striving towards the ineffable — and yet they all refer to the same thing.
As a tarot reader, if a client reacts in confusion about what it is that I’m saying, I don’t throw my hands up in defeat; I’ll try and say it a different way, and I’ll keep on saying it until we meet at the centre of the crossroads. When I am working with clients who would never consider themselves ‘spiritual’ in any sense of the word, and yet I can clearly see that they are searching for something, then I see it as my responsibility as the reader to approach them on their terms, to try their hat on for size. I have read comments from other tarot readers where they have stated that they will make no effort to explain what they are saying. Why, I ask myself? What is the point of doing a reading for someone when you’re not talking the same language? It is alienating, and at least one party will walk away feeling like they have failed. Sometimes I do fail — miserably — and while failure isn’t always a welcome visitor, it always brings a gift, humility being the most frequent and the most levelling.
With tarot, language is a means to an end — that end being a place that lies beyond words. Words can only approximate that place, which is why it behooves us to get as creative as we can with them. So when we get a client who is wholly different from us — in fact, when we encounter anyone or anything with whom we feel little or nothing in common — how about rejoicing? We get to learn how to build bridges, and we have an opportunity to deepen our connection with our creativity in the process.
If you want to experiment with tarot cards and don’t have any, we provide a free tarot spread generator using the Celtic Wings spread, which is based on the traditional Celtic Cross spread. This article explains how to use the spread.
Aword, Hugging, Huffy and CaraSusanetta: Thank you, I truly love you all. Sorry if I missed anyone, please know you are all in my thanking.
Participants in this discussion thread: please check the email address associated with your Planet Waves Word Press account.
I am closing comments for this discussion.
Just to perfectly illustrate my point…
Alexander: This is your need, not mine. I believe that I have been quite honest and open regarding who I am, what I do and how I do it. I am also very aware that you are uncomfortable and I have disturbed you.
I value Wisdom above the Intellectual. It is how I am wired. I can only assume that you are wired in opposite fashion to me.
I am quite willing to find a common ground and understanding with you, but to be honest, I find your comments to me to be quite rude, flippant, belittling and condescending.
Until you choose to step up to the plate and rectify this, I am complete in our communication together.
See Mandy, the problem I am having here is that you adopt a tone of authority when speaking as yourself. Ok right.. so that is as YOURSELF, Mandy. You challenge as yourself. Now when people challenge back as who they are you reserve the right to not respond as yourself but as some kind of channel or mouthpiece of higher authority.. which, last time I checked, tends to be somewhat unassailable and certainly unaccountable. While I respect your stated life intent, perhaps on a forum such as this, you would be more honest if you declared yourself as a channel and then spoke only as that channel.. Otherwise there is more than a slight problem with the very essence of a debating forum. The formula starts to feel uncomfortable with you challenging as Mandy and then processing responses via a channel modality.
This is intellectually dishonest and I simply MUST call you out on it.
You are right Eric, I do have a mission. I was handed the Pipe by Goddess White Buffalo Calf Woman herself, and with that Pipe comes great Responsibility, Compassion and Humility. It is my deep desire and intent to honour Her completely.
Is anyone going to clear my two rumba videos (in moderation below) for posting? Someone should make a flower essence from them, which I’ll be happy to prescribe as needed…
My name is Mandy, not gal. Please respect that.
Alexander: “We are ALL responsible for this toxic planet? Tell that to an Eskimo or an Aborigine or a Native American. Speaking in a generic, poetic way is no substitute for analysis! It’s like drop the woffle gal.. [Yes, I can do winky face too].”
I was trained by Sacred Pipe Carriers of the Anishinaabe (Beings Made Out Of Nothing), First Nations. It was them that told me. I believe that fills your required credentials for analysis. I would love to hear of your experiences walking among these Noble People.
I believe the use of the word WE in the following parlays that:
Mitakuye (my relative), I, Chief Arvol Looking Horse, of the Lakota, Dakota, and Nakota Nation, asks you to understand an Indigenous perspective on what has happened in America, what we call “Turtle Island.”
My words seek to unite the global community through a message from our sacred ceremonies to unite spiritually, each in our own ways of beliefs in the Creator.
We have been warned from Ancient Prophecies of these times we live in today, but have also been given a very important message about a solution to turn these terrible times around.
To understand the depth of this message you must recognize the importance of Sacred Sites and realize the interconnectedness of what is happening today, in reflection of the continued massacres that are occurring on other lands and our own Americas. I have been learning about these important issues since the age of 12, upon receiving the Sacred White Buffalo Calf Pipe Bundle and its teachings.
Our people have striven to protect Sacred Sites from the beginning of time. These places have been violated for centuries and have brought us to the predicament that we are in at the global level. Look around you. Our Mother Earth is very ill from these violations, and we are on the brink of destroying the possibility of a healthy and nurturing survival for generations to come, our children’s children.
Our ancestors have been trying to protect our Sacred Site called the Sacred Black Hills in South Dakota, “Heart of Everything That Is,” from continued violations. Our ancestors never saw a satellite view of this site, but now that those pictures are available, we see that it is in the shape of a heart and, when fast-forwarded, it looks like a heart pumping.
The Dine have been protecting Big Mountain, calling it the liver, and we are suffering and going to suffer more from the extraction of the coal from there and the poison processes used in doing so.
The Aborigines have warned of the contaminating effects of global warming on the Coral Reefs, which they see as Mother Earth’s blood purifier.
The Indigenous people of the rainforest relay that the rainforest are the lungs of the planet and need protection.
The Gwich’in Nation has had to face oil drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge coastal plain, also known to the Gwich’in as “Where life begins!” The coastal plain is the birthplace of many life forms of the Animal Nations.
The death of these Animal Nations will destroy Indigenous Nations in this territory. As these destructive developments continue all over the world, we will witness many more extinct Animal, Plant, and Human Nations, because of mankind’s misuse of power and their lack of understanding of the “balance of life.”
The Indigenous people warn that these destructive developments will cause havoc globally. There are many, many more Indigenous awarenesses and knowledge about Mother Earth’s Sacred Sites, her Chakras, connections to our spirit that will surely affect our future generations.
There needs to be a fast move toward other forms of energy that are safe for all Nations upon Mother Earth. We need to understand the types of minds that are continuing to destroy the spirit of our whole global community. Unless we do this, the powers of destruction will overwhelm us. Our Ancestors foretold that water would someday be for sale. Back then, this was hard to believe, since the water was so plentiful, so pure, and so full of energy, nutrition, and spirit. Today we have to buy pure water, and even then the nutritional minerals have been taken out; it’s just empty liquid. Someday water will be like gold, too expensive to afford. Not everyone will have the right to drink safe water.
We fail to appreciate and honor our Sacred Sites, ripping out the minerals and gifts that lay underneath them as if Mother Earth were simply a resource, instead of the Source of Life itself.
Attacking Nations and having to utilize more resources to carry out destruction in the name of peace is not the answer!
We need to understand how all these decisions affect the Global Nation; we will not be immune to its repercussions. Allowing continual contamination of our food and land is affecting the way we think. A “disease of the mind” has set in world leaders and many members of our global community, with their belief that a solution of retaliation and destruction of peoples will bring Peace.
In our Prophecies it is told that we are now at the crossroads: Either unite spiritually as a Global Nation, or be faced with chaos, disasters, diseases, and tears from our relatives’ eyes. We are the only species that is destroying the Source of Life, meaning Mother Earth, in the name of power, mineral resources, and ownership of land, using chemicals and methods of warfare that are doing irreversible damage, as Mother Earth is becoming tired and cannot sustain any more impacts of war.
I ask you to join me on this endeavor. Our vision is for the Peoples of all continents, regardless of their beliefs in the Creator, to come together as one at their Sacred Sites to pray and meditate and commune with one another, thus promoting an energy shift to heal our Mother Earth and achieve a universal consciousness toward attaining Peace.
As each day passes, I ask all Nations to begin a global effort, and remember to give thanks for the Sacred Food that has been gifted to us by our Mother Earth, so the nutritional energy of medicine can be guided to heal our minds and spirits. This new millennium will usher in an age of harmony or it will bring the end of life as we know it. Starvation, war, and toxic waste have been the hallmark of the Great Myth of Progress and Development that ruled the last millennium. To us, as caretakers of the heart of Mother Earth, falls the responsibility of turning back the powers of destruction.
You yourself are the one who must decide. You alone – and only you – can make this crucial choice, to walk in honor or to dishonor your relatives. On your decision depends the fate of the entire World. Each of us is put here in this time and this place to personally decide the future of humankind. Did you think the Creator would create unnecessary people in a time of such terrible danger? Know that you yourself are essential to this World. Believe that! Understand both the blessing and the burden of that. You yourself are desperately needed to save the soul of this World. Did you think you were put here for something less? In a Sacred Hoop of Life, there is no beginning and no ending!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6xw9tIMJcI&feature=related
and this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kIYyODRhrxI
thank you too Huffy
love Pam
Thanks Pam! Dance me to the end of love is one of my favourite songs ever. And loved all that you wrote about it here, no time to say more…
Or dancing?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8VwvO0ewDE&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__ebR_8UKAY&feature=related
Any place is still the dance, any time, any circumstance.
enough!
xxxp
As regards ‘sex’, I don’t think anyone said it better than Dylan Thomas (and sorry if I repeat myself): “The force that through the green fuse drives the flower”.
Uhm – if the mother is truly compassionate, which often isn’t the case…
“that compassion is always wise, it isn’t.. especially when it obscures the path of responsible and necessay use of strength”. True compassion *is* wise, Alex. Even if it means a mother saying no to her child, for example, that ‘no’ comes from a place of wisdom and love.
ps to life giving – and of course sex!
xxxp
praps love is not a good word either. too archaic. Life giving? – then that is breath and air and light, water, earth.
probably ‘Love’ is as good a word as any – not tied to anything obviously physically manifest?
Growing vegetables and living simply in nature is an important tuning fork (at least for me), is sex another – can I not love both. feet and hands in the earth, grounded and in contact with life – trees more and more for me, an integrity? Where the landscape moves however subtlely, because the trees move and breathe and everything grows all around.
MandyM: We are ALL responsible for this toxic planet? Tell that to an Eskimo or an Aborigine or a Native American. Speaking in a generic, poetic way is no substitute for analysis! It’s like drop the woffle gal.. 😉 [Yes, I can do winky face too].
That same generic thinking with poetic gloss is what you are invoking when you construct a similar argument that what you heard from me is about problems, problems rather than solutions. Firstly, if we are not precisely clear on the nature of some problems then solutions simply elude. Second, it is not simply my responsibility to solve the problems I outline. To claim that outlining themclearly is tantamount to doing anything but attempting to solve them is intellectually sloppy and frankly, poor form. Third, how do you know that I don’t work to solve them outside of this cyberspace, debating context?
I am actually prepared to take responsibility for my actions rather than parade a false humility. In a word, this means that I take responsibility for the judgments I make and don’t dress them up in finery. I also reserve the right to be moved by compassion and act accordingly, rather than mistakenly believing that compassion is always wise, it isn’t.. especially when it obscures the path of responsible and necessay use of strength..
Alexander – sex, bonding a mother to a child? Only indirectly.
Love that gives of itself, only sex (the harry potter series explores this in several ways). sometimes?
Friendship only sex? sometimes.
There are other doors too.
Light is only sex? sometimes.
listening to a tree only sex. i think not.
Isn’t love the binding factor (agape not eros or philia). rings within rings. The deeper you go.
Or sex as seminal. Then that is seminal. Seed. source. Can be sex, can also be other: water for instance, to a desert people.
There’s always more? And more than one way to be.
Perhaps?
And thank you for your beautiful piece, dear Sarah, that set all of this off. I always feel such a deep connection with your words.
“I have nothing in common with except cooking a vegan tofu stir-fry dinner and watching cult movies by Serge Gainsbourg (check).” Hugging, you just crack me up! Whatever girl you end up with – make sure she has a great sense of humour!
Eric – discernment is what the Buddha called ‘wisdom’. Knowing when it is the right time to act (in the appropriate way), and the right time to do nothing; the right time to speak (the right words), and the right time to stay silent. And that in knowing our own hearts, we are able to understand the hearts of others.
Wow! ‘One short sleep’, and I wake up to this amazing conversation! MandyM – as ever, I am touched by your honesty, your energy, your desire to communicate with others and to know. I wanted to write something in reply to your words that day – but I just didn’t know where to start- especially, as others say, I didn’t know exactly where you were coming from. Sometimes words can be misconstrued (and who hasn’t had this experience with text messages and emails?), so I didn’t write anything in reply that day. It’s funny, cos that day I had almost written a reply to the other comments. Kids are under so much pressure to conform – and if we find the pace of life fast – I often think how hard it must be for them to keep up with everything! Arrogance and cockiness hides deep insecurity and fear that they’re not ‘good enough’.
My mum went to a workshop of Carolyn Myss’s at Findhorne many moons ago. We both worshipped the woman at the time (yes, my ma is a difficult lass, but totally amazing, too – and I have inherited her ‘healing hands’). She came away with the same reaction as you – one giant-sized ego! And I loved your last comment on forgiveness.
There is a different between judgment and discernment — a big difference. We could talk about this; thoughts welcome.
Sarah,
Your humility is a source of inspiration.
Thank you
Response about forgiveness: Forgiveness is a part of healing. It is the alchemical ingredient for letting go. Many people think they have let go of the past, only to have it resurface – some times many years later.
The reason I asked for it on that day (we do support radical honesty here right? Ya gotta remember I’m Scorpio with Mercury in the 9th, I go to the place of taboo – I am very much that pile of shit which, ironically is what my dad used to call me. I could have used THAT to beat me down, depress me, get angry about, hate him for – instead I realized that shit is good fertilizer and took it as a compliment every time he said it and imagined all the gardens of life I was growing so well. He also told me I would grow up to be nothing. Great! Everything comes from nothing. I know nothing very well. I am told often that I have a great talent for making something beautiful out of nothing. You should see the incredible rock garden I made for Gem from the giant pile of rubble and crap that was left after home renovations)…..diverted….revert…..The reason I asked for forgiveness that day is I had written about children’s brains getting larger, they are incarnating wired for the future. I expressed that I had experiences with children being punished, by force or with ritalin, for being this way – specifically in school where it is intentionally, over the years, being designed to suppress the right brain (just a fractal of suppress the feminine/Goddess). I know I found it very difficult in school – particularly the florescent lighting (which must be harder on the now bigger brains) and history class (war, domination, massacres – haven’t we ever done anything good?), so I can’t imagine what it must be like for them. And we force them to do it, because that’s what we did. They are screaming inside, they are not heard. We are forcing them to work and live in the structure of the old paradigm when they are wired otherwise. Not much different from the teachers that used to smack my hand with their rulers because I am left handed.
After I posted that, I was in a space of open hearted compassion for our youth. When I came back and read the other comments, the judgement and resentment hit me hard. As is our dysfunctional-but-we-have-made-normal way, I started judging and resenting them for their comments. I wanted to ask what they were doing to help the youth with all the issues that they were talking about. I realized that I was emotional so I went to another post, and lo and behold one of the previous commenters that I was judging was expressing the intention to have more compassion for others, especially in communication. I was kinda stunned. I went back to the other post and noticed that there was about 5 minutes between the judgement comment and the compassion comment (the pendulum effect).
That was the moment I got hit with the iron fist. I was doing exactly what they were doing. I was judging them for judging others. Fuckin’ crazy. You are me, I am you – good, bad and ugly. We are all one. Whatever I am judging someone for, I have done or am doing myself – no matter how minute. You will not see it if you do not have it within yourself, even if it is deeply buried or denied. As someone said recently, when a message is given the message is also for the messenger. I use this as a learning tool for myself as much as I can – I always go back and read what I wrote just for that purpose. Many times I stumble on this and miss it – I am just like everyone else.
In that moment it hit me – we are ALL responsible for this toxic planet. It doesn’t matter if it’s government, pedophiles, religion, war, nuclear shit, money abuse, addictions – whatever you term dark and bad – we had a hand in it, somehow, somewhere – in a multitude of ways, whether being passive, uncaring, irresponsible, expecting others to deal with it, judging it instead of doing something to change it, whatever. How can our children learn wisdom in this environment? We don’t teach them that. Intelligence that isn’t balanced with wisdom is just a runaway train and I tell my kids that often. But ‘out there’ it’s all bigger, faster, stronger, smarter.
This is the crux of where we are now. If we keep throwing our anger and judgement on THEM (whoever them is), we aren’t going to get this. Believe me, I heard myself loud and clear when I told Eric he wasn’t walking his talk. Damn right, I haven’t been.
The judgement of THEM was overwhelming for me in that moment, inside myself and outside of myself. Yes, the DEMONS – of our hearts and minds and planet. And I realized how much trouble we are in if we can’t let blame and judgement go. And I knew that to do that we need to start forgiving – I needed to start forgiving – you, myself and them. Because we are all one. And since this big circle is about giving and receiving, I began with asking to receive. I know that when I do that, I am also forgiving myself and them, because we are all one. When you say “it is not my place to forgive you, it’s between you and God” – well, you are me and I am you, you are God and God is you, I am God and God is me. You are only telling me that it is not your place to forgive yourself. It is not your, my or our place to forgive THEM, therefore God is unforgiving? I looked at my comment and the other comments that day and picked out all the ‘words’ that we all had used as judgements. That is why I asked forgiveness for those particular things – if I had really gotten into it, I probably could have filled that page. I especially wanted forgiveness from our youth for creating an insane asylum for them and expecting them to be good and normal in it.
I believe in the very near future a lot of people will be asking for forgiveness. I think it is a virtue that has been forgotten. 99% of the comments on the Hatfield/McCoy movie were about the violence, the blaming, the hate. One person commented on the truce that occurred – the forgiving. We are still in history class apparently.
I notice a lot of people use the terms ‘just sayin’ and ‘that’s my opinion’ (I don’t understand the purpose of these statements, I think it’s obvious that’s what you are doing). Your opinions and sayings are your beliefs. I believe we are wasting a massive amount of energy just sayin’ and opinioning. I have definitely noticed that the Gemini essence is so busy thinking and talking that it doesn’t listen. You can’t do both at the same time. Has anybody visited a youth shelter or hostel to listen to them? When ‘listening’ to your children, are you already formulating your response and criticism before they have even finished? Do you acknowledge their feelings as very real and true for them, do you accept them or try to change them?
I just feel so bombarded, everywhere I look, with so many blaming and judging and pointing out the problems. The percentage of people stating solutions seems very small (no matter how small the thought or concept, it is a starting place). If we want to state the problem, perhaps we might include the lesson learned from it – particularly where are you doing/contributing to said problem in your own life?
It’s amazing how a 45 second process can take so long to write about.
Mandy, I am talking about an agenda.
You have your mission; part of mine is to call that agenda what it is. We have spent the past 2,000 years being told that sex is bad and “spiritual” is good. We don’t need to waste good plastic on DVDs supposedly purporting to be modern, scientific spirituality that do the same thing.
also, dear Mandy, I did see your request but I didn’t know why you felt the need to ask for it. I don’t feel anyone was judging you. I don’t think we really do that on this blog. If I did, it was completely unintentional.
Eric: I believe I suggested that one should find the gold in the shit. Understand it’s purpose. Shit/dark/wrong/ugly is just a perspective that people choose. I offer the perspective that shit makes excellent fertilizer. It is your free will to choose (discern) to find it useful or not.
Alexander: I’m sorry but your language is at a level that I have not attained yet. Can you speak Matrix? 😉 The loudest thing I hear in your comment is “the problem is….the problem is…..”. You found the shit. What will you do with it?
“If you have time to complain about it, you have time to clean it up.”
From a sign along the trail…..
Communication.hmmmm. Mandy, I did see your request, and did not answer; to be quite frank, had no idea WHY you made it. I saw nothing in your postings, or in responses to them that revealed they warranted apology or forgiveness. Maybe I missed something significant, or maybe not. This is a pretty darned polite group, especially considering the controversial nature of our topics in mundane circles…
Hi Mandy,
I understand the point you are making in your reference to my comment a few days ago. I also feel I explained myself very carefully and sincerely. You don’t have to feel sad for me, I feel fantastic! I also stand by what I said, that the youth do have to prove themselves. That’s why they’re youths and learning, and to put that knowledge into action is to prove themselves. Every sentient being on this planet is special. To learn that symbiotic relationship is a process done in humility. What I see is not very humble. That is a generalization of course, but the parents’ that set an example of entitlement is a part of that problem. The other big one is simply the speed in which we acquire information. We lose the value in things when everything is done and received too quickly. I’m pretty sure we’re on the same boat on that one Mandy, otherwise you wouldn’t have such an affinity with native wisdom as you do.
As for sex, well, I’ll stand back and learn from my elders here. I have learned to chill out somewhat and simply ask for sex as something beautiful and natural and I thank Eric in part for giving me a pair of balls to do that (also Huffy and Stormi too cause they rock in a serious way) because sometime girls get horny too I found out. A heart connection is about trust as much as the desire to be real within that trust. To open the heart and to feel good about doing that with someone in a way that we can let go of inhibitions. But I also have to have discernment, otherwise I risk getting into bed with a married woman (check) or into bed with someone I have nothing in common with except cooking a vegan tofu stir-fry dinner and watching cult movies by Serge Gainsbourg (check). Not sure if I even make sense…
Okay, just my 2 cents.
Cheerio-ee-yo,
HS
Hi MandyM. I did not see your request for forgiveness on PW last week. My usual position on Forgiveness is that it is not mine to give; all is already forgiven and therefore any requests for additional are between God and the Self. However, i am more than happy to offer to you whatever humble forgivingness it is that is mine to give.
xo
Thanks ladies. And I apologize, it is my intention to be more mindful of my words and communication – it was my initial REACTION to the experiences that was horrible, not the experience themselves.
White Buffalo Calf Woman was ONE manifestation of the Goddess. She promised to return. It would be wise to heed her teaching. This is why they now call it the Peace Pipe – it is smoked before any council meeting or important discussion between anyone. The Goddess has risen and the masculine essences may want to carry a white flag in their back pocket from now on. If you don’t accept the velvet glove teachings, what follows is the iron fist. I believe, at this time, it is called the wrath of a woman.
Thanks for correcting my spelling on C & M Sarah.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, “Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and famous?” Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We are born to make manifest the Glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. – A Course In Miracles
I asked for forgiveness on this blog last week. No one responded or acknowledged it. No one offered it. For those of you who saw it, you might want to ask yourself why you chose to ignore it.
I proclaim that, for now and evermore, I refuse to shrink from the Glory that I AM. I claim my Power.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C6kLbDHu0yc
Hi Sarah,
Really enjoyed this one, thanks so much!
Oh thank you for this articulation Alexander, “Once people sex with other people, heart connection may be birthed, because heart connection is not some special category offering ‘added value’ but the very essence of what bonds people.. which is sex, however that happens to manifest.”.
Copyn’Paste’d to my desktop. Excellent. Thank you.
<< Isn’t the entire point of what we are all going through right now about STOPPING that? >>
Mandy, are you suggesting that we cease to have discernment?
The category of ‘special’ bears looking at here. Particularly because what humans do all the time seemingly, is quantify. MandyM, you suggest that everything is special. But if that were possible then nothing would be special because special would be normative. Take this whole sex is ordinary/special dyad. The problem here is that sex has been systematically removed from the arena of its own utter naturalness. It sells and is an advertiser’s biggest dream. The problem is that advertising sells ideas and implants them dishonestly. Visceral, uninterpreted sex is the enemy of advertising, which is always creating an association between ‘sex and’.
The quest to liberate sex from the grip of distortion is paramount. You might say that any specialness that might ever be located within real sex between two people requires all filters to be ditched and its basic naturalness to be embraced. Ironically, heart connection often becomes a euphimism for sex because the two have been separated. So yes, over literal reliance on lexical defiinitions is a huge problem because it even suggests that heart connection and sex are different things. Where really, everything is just what it is. And so people’s scope to strip back sex to its core is arguably the only way filters of distortion can be overcome. Once people sex with other people, heart connection may be birthed, because heart connection is not some special category offering ‘added value’ but the very essence of what bonds people.. which is sex, however that happens to manifest.
Intriguing conversation here. Sarah, thanks for sparking it. MandyM, love your stories.
Thx.
MandyM – Yes. 🙂 I hope you saw what I meant in my unintentionally ambiguous comment about the curtain being whipped away — that it was (I felt) being whipped away on Caroline Myss and Marianne Williamson in your eyes, which was the ‘lesson’ in and of itself rather than anything in particular that they had to say.
I am ambivalent about gurus, or perhaps there is an inherent contradiction in them: that is, that you learn from them, and then learn, from that, to forge your own way.
Eric: What stood out to me about your comment was separating the ‘good’ of this movie from the ‘bad’. Isn’t the entire point of what we are all going through right now about STOPPING that? I’ll be bold here: I don’t see you walking your talk when you do this. And I know everyone is doing this right now – it’s the pendulum effect to eventually rest in the middle balance, easier said than done but we have to be mindful and catch ourselves when we do it, or hopefully have friends with big hairy balls that will point it out to us.
“One of my central points is that sex is not special. It’s a normal, everyday kind of thing.”
This makes me very sad for you, as I felt sad for HS when he said the youth of today aren’t special either until they ‘prove’ themselves. That tells me that somewhere inside each of you, you don’t feel special. Everything (even ‘normal’ everyday stuff) is special. We have just chosen to not make it special. Everything is a sacred act, even washing the dishes.
No, I am not talking about romance. I don’t even think I understand that concept, it’s never been a part of my fabric. I believe I am referring to the entire meaning of the word ‘namaste – I recognize and honour the Divine within you as it is in me.” People get far too Virgo with specific words. It’s either Love or Fear. Trust is a form of Love. I think it’s best summed up in the Legend of White Buffalo Calf Woman – translated here into blunt english:
Two braves are crossing the desert and notice a dust cloud coming towards them. It morphs into a woman. Brave #1 says to his buddy “Hey, ain’t she a hot babe. Wouldn’t I like to do her!!” Brave #2 says to him “Shame on you! Do you not recognize a Holy woman when you see one?” As they meet the woman, she looks at brave #1 and says “I heard what you said” and instantly reduces him to a pile of dust. She tells brave #2 to return to camp and tell them that she is coming.
She teaches them the Sacred Pipe Ceremony. The stem of the pipe is the phallus, the bowl the vagina. The tobacco is the sacred herb (Divine Spirit) that when lit is pulled through the bowl and stem. It is dishonourable and disrespectful to smoke the pipe without first creating a heart connection within yourself to the Divine Creator.
Sarah: I realized after posting that I should have added what those experiences taught me. And this is what I mean when I keep saying that darkness/ego has it’s purpose. It was after the Carolyn thing that I understood the Marianne thing. I realized I had Carolyn on a pedestal (what many of us do with gurus, thank you HS). I realized that she is just like me, no better no worse. I realized that she is just a reflection of me. It was a moment that, for me, not only had the student surpassed the teacher, the student was becoming a Master – of herself.
Okay, yes, that makes perfect sense. For me, that’s a framework, or a foundation, and then we can choose to build our concept and choices about sex from there.
I am not saying that others need to stick to biology. I keep things in the realm of the biological, or you could say, I use that as my frame of reference, because sex IS biological — it’s part of the experience and study of life. It’s something that has a central point of focus in our bodies, and is associated with body communication and reproduction. It’s not limited to those things, though the whole “issue” of sex can get so controversial and come off the rails so fast, one of the ways to keep grounded is to remember that it is a normal biological function. We would learn a lot of [what we would think of as] shocking things if we kept an eye on biology. And among other benefits, biology obviates the concept of sin, which is the thing that most people who suffer around sex suffer from, directly or indirectly.
Len, thank you! (((((((Len))))))) I feel honoured that you commented.
MandyM – I *so* resonate with you about The Matrix – it brought in an entirely new audience. I’m sorry about your experiences with Marianne Williamson and Caroline Myss – or maybe I’m not, simply because I think that we all have those elements of The Great Oz inside us, and it is good to have the curtain whipped away every now and then. It is easy to deify some people over others — Hollywood has made an industry of it — to the point where we forget that we are all deities.
Eric – I’m interested: why stick to biology when discussing sex? I am genuinely curious, and think that I have perhaps gaps in my understanding of this.
Hi Mandy, what do you mean “heart connection” in this context? I don’t know what you’ve read or not read of my work. I make a point of avoiding the discussion of anything that can be construed as romantic, so that may be what you feel is missing.
Everything I do I do with a heart connection, though I emphasize this as a matter of trust rather than love. From my observation, most of what we desire from love we could more easily get from trust, and ultimately love is meaningless without trust.
That is my point of origin, though when discussing sex, I do my best to focus on biology. One of my central points is that sex is not special. It’s a normal, everyday kind of thing. It’s made a kind of ‘special’ by omission, by insult and by being co-opted.
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I went to a Marianne Williamson workshop many years ago. I got up in front of the crowd and relayed a story about meeting a man at a bus stop. I had a bag full of Native American teachings on spirituality, as I had just entered AA and that was how I first began my understanding of God/Creator. I noticed the guy had a can of beer and was openly drinking from it. I was horrified – I judged him as we all do with derelicts. I turned my back to him. Then I heard him say “Excuse me, but God just told me to say hello to you.” My thought was “Wow, I’ve attracted a lunatic.” And then I thought, “Hey, wait a minute – I believe in that. I believe that God will talk to anyone.” I smiled and said hello back. Long story short, I learned his story and shared mine. He was a Native American. He had walked away from his Clan. I showed him my books and some of the Great Elder sayings. I encouraged him to return to his people. It ended with him in tears, hugging me and saying “I just knew you were an Angel!” He promised me he would return to his Way. I think of him often. Anyway, after telling this story at the workshop, Miss M just stared at me. Everyone before me she responded to what they said. With me, she just dismissed me and went back to the message she gives that Jesus is the only way. This doesn’t mean that her teachings may very well be the kick start that people relate to in order to find their way.
The same thing happened with Carolyn Myss last year. I love the woman but I threw up after the workshop it was so horrible. Her ego is the size of the room when she speaks of herself channeling Theresa of Avila. She is one of the most arrogant people I have ever met. She literally told the entire crowd that if they were into crystals, talisman pouches and “all that crap”, that they were stupid. It doesn’t mean that what she teaches needs to be thrown out.
Yes, wouldn’t it be great if we were all perfect? No shadow/ego? It is in everyone and everything but you don’t throw the baby out with the bath water. I think What the Bleep is very attractive to the younger generation, makes it easy for them to understand complicated concepts and if that movie is their mustard seed that creates the curiosity to search and understand more, then it served its purpose. I spent years trying to explain this stuff to a guy and he just didn’t get it. Then the lightbulb went off when I realized how much he loves The Matrix movies. I started talking Matrix Movie language and he lit up like a christmas tree. He got it.
Eric I support and admire your passion and work about the sexual revolution. I will admit that the one thing that I find missing is emphasis on a heart connection. I don’t care if you fuck 15 purple people all at the same time, the heart connection is the alchemical ingredient needed for it to become Sacred Sex instead of lust. I do believe that was one of the messages of Venus.
People are supposed to use their Scorpio power to see through the shit and find the gold in EVERYTHING.
Sarah,
Thank you for a truly engaging, thought-provoking and widely applicable piece. Your elucidation of “splitting” behavior is as clear and authentic (so far as my own knowledge of the subject matter goes) as any i have ever read. Speaking as one who has one foot in the world of fey, your sentiment and expression are deeply appreciated.
Noting is without its merits.
I have learned a lot visiting concentration camps and from being arrested for traffic infractions by gung-ho cops. It’s all a matter of the cost; I think we have to be lucid and honest in our spiritual pursuits, with transparent motives.
I could go with the film as a crude and sugary teaching tool, except for the parts about trivializing and shaming sex. That’s the point where they revealed they know nothing about cosmology, having denied the genesis of life.
Though it’s not a movie, a book that actually succeeds at what “What the Bleep” tries to do is The Holographic Universe by Michael Talbot — a fun, easy read, nearly all told in stories, and something that will pleasantly rearrange your worldview.
Interestingly, in one of the first edits of this article, I had mentioned the sexuality angle, and then took it out because it started to feel irrelevant based on the subject of the article. My description of it as “twee” goes some way to expressing my sentiments about the ways in which some of the content was handled. So, in other words, Eric, I am in agreement about that. Having said that, I do think it provokes thought about ‘spirituality’ not being an alien concept in our physical world – that there is integration there.
Just a note about “what the bleep do we know.” I am aware many of my readers like this film, but I have a few problems with it. One is that it attempts to prove spirituality with scientism — that is, religion in the guise of science. My deepest issue with this film is that it belittles sex and desire, beginning with the title of the work, which censors the word “fuck” as somehow inappropriate. It portrays as embarrassing or shameful the desire of an older man for a younger woman; there were many other instances where the authors and director displayed disrespect for sexual feelings and the necessity for understanding them. This film is on the top of my “skip it” list, earning that spot for its use of disinformation and misinformation.