As most readers have been following with, I’m polling the Sun signs and the rising signs to get a sense of what your past four or five seasons have been about; how you’ve been responding to the challenges you’ve been facing, the opportunities, and the astrology so far as you know it. This is in preparation for Cosmic Confidential, the 2010 annual edition. [We are currently offering pre-orders of the annual to subscribers to Planet Waves and Next World Stories, and it’s already a bestseller.]
We are now up to Libra. Librans experienced something interesting earlier this year — Venus retrograde in their opposite sign; with a bit of the retrograde touching on Pisces. This is a kind of ultimate astrological mirror: your ‘ruling’ planet, showing up in your opposite sign.
More recently, Saturn left your 12th solar house Virgo and entered your birth sign, where it’s now about to square Pluto. This would have something to do with how you reconcile your identity with the one your family thought it gave you. There’s something here about going beyond appearances. Please let me know in the comment space below, or via email.
Virgos — you must be very busy — we heard the least from you. Would you be kind enough to add your comments to the Virgo entry, below? Many thanks.
cosmicsigns
Whoops, just realized that I published my Libra story on the Sag page…that tells you something about how chaos enters my world – not sure where Uranus figures in my chart, but it is alive and active. As is self-awareness, eventually.
So this is Libra, Scorpio rising with some additional notes: In this year, I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’ve become a country girl. I never would have imagined it. I was such a city girl (needing that energy), or so I thought. The high rises, pollution, the endless traffic all bum me out, and I am so relieved when I get home. And so privileged. Now for the first time, I am planting roots deeper down…although I wish it was a warmer, dryer climate for such things (maybe it will be in a decade or less) and a more diverse community (color-wise). As I slow down from the driven, ambitious, need to be where it’s happening, need to address the urgent issues of our time, need to wake people up, kinda gal, I want to learn the woods, the plants, and some more useful tools necessary to hand down to younger ones. Of course, being in the woods is isolating, so I want to spend more time singing and dancing in my community.
I’m not sure what Saturn returning to Libra is supposed to mean for me, but I do recognize some maturity coming in, some coming to terms with my aging, more resilience with my shadow side, more capacity to be joyful. Nothing too dramatic – like life-threatening diseases (had more than enough of that in past decades), but there’s a fair amount of change happening and some sadness and loneliness from that.
Hi, I’m Libra sun with Leo ascendent and moon. I’m a married women of 50, three children, two grand children. The immediate family life for me has been very fulfilling and lots of meaningful deep growth over the years.
This has been an especially difficult year. I felt compelled to contribute, now trying to find the meat of it all. I am not fluent in astrology, yet learning more as I go.
It seemed shadow work in relationships was prominent.
Needing to hold to my sense of integrity surrounded by a group(community) situation that claimed they were full of love, just vision all the beautiful flowers flowing through peoples energy and everything will automatically come out smelling like roses! No need to look at where we had come from and the past things that could be greatly upgraded. Lies, denial, and people not doing what they committed to.
This community was based on healing of the planet, our selves and expanding consciousness through shamanic ritual. It is still functioning, yet it could be sooo much more.
After a complete year of struggle to work withe key people within this group several of us walked away… after 10 years of this work and commitment to these people. This has been a death in many ways. I finally walked away June 2, 2009.
I knew it was the right action for my life path.
I feel so much more is coming into my life, yet it is not quite here. Patience… allowing the past to be fully finished, watching where my projections are and also my trigger points. I continue to look deeply into what is mine.
One thing I continually found fascinating was the parallel of this group dynamic with what was and is continuing to happen in the political spectrum. I think this is the Aries point aspect.
I have been very grateful for this site and the wise words coming through. I always find great hope in what is to come forward in the time to come.
One big lesson that was driven home to me is that a lot of people know how to work energy, but what level of energy are they working for or with? Are they even aware of how they are using it or being used by others?
As far as identity within my birth family, that seems to be stable, but this other group identity was defiantly an illusion busting event!
One more interesting thing for me. Yesterday when I decided I wanted to respond to this post, I had not gotten a password. By the time I did this I stood up to do something and my lower back went out. This had been coming on for several months but not sever enough to have it looked at…. now is the time, ouch! More to look at.
I hope this helps,
Jeanne
oh where to begin? libra sun & moon , venus rising in scorpio..i have felt fortunate somehow in the midst of all the angst and shutdown happening around me..this year has been a pinnacle for bad health, and i feel my force of will slipping and hiding under the covers..have tried numerous times to rally and get my carcass on the move, but the spark doesnt light the fire..waiting for divine intervention, and praying for an energy shift i can use!….i am looking forward to saturn making its way into libra, because i need the calcium, the backbone to move into the coming cardinal squares..
hmm…thought about responding before but didn’t. Since you’re asking again, I’ll try.
I’m a Libra sun but it’s a triple wallop because my sun-mars-jupiter are all conjunct in early Libra. Whee!
I like my Libra-ness although lots of people don’t understand it…. it’s about structure and form and keeping those things intact, letting one’s inner nature express itself through its natural forms…..
My year has been interesting. I’ve learned to recognize that I have a mild anxiety disorder — not so bad as Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, but bad enough to cause unnecessary suffering and to be an obstacle to accomplishing things large and small.
It was quite a surprise to learn this but once I had the revelation it was completely obvious, there without a doubt. It was immediately clear that I have had this issue for most of my life.
So wow, that’s pretty cool to learn something big about yourself that you never suspected at all.
In other ways it’s been positive…financially it has been very good although fraught with worry, if that makes sense. I feared losing my job but didn’t, and it’s a good job and pays well, so that’s that.
Lots of folks here wrote about relationships and all I can say in that category is that I gained some clarity about a couple of close relationships, but the nature of those connections didn’t change much.
I had some long-distance travel, more than in recent years, and I continue to do my creative work. All in all not a bad period.
My mars-sun conjunction is right at the beginning of Libra (o and 2 degrees respectively) and right on the cusp of my fifth house, if you go by Placidus system. Jupiter is loosely conjuct at 10 Libra.
So you can surmise that it’s a Gemini rising chart…I’m very airy 😉
The last 12 months have been profound for me, a Libra. My mother died in October 2008. There’s no experience like it. I’ve read a lot about grief, another part of my story. I think that the universal truth about it isn’t loss, although there’s a huge gap in my life now, it’s regret. The choices that I made in the past may or may not have been right for me at the time, but today, I regret not being a better daughter. The choices I had to make for her at the end of her life, the doctor assured me were correct, but I’ll never know for sure.
The shift in my mind in the last 12 months has been profound, not only due to my mother’s death but also because I do a lot of very serious meditation based on an energy focused meditation. From that form of meditation I’ve been very blessed. I’ve had experiences in meditation that most people cannot even imagine. They have profoundly changed my life beginning 12 years ago. However, I feel that in the last year, even the last four weeks particularly, it’s come together, and I stand at a point where the next manifestation will be one that at least brings me to a point where I live in this life with some satisfaction. As always, meditation is hard to put into words.
I had my self stripped from me 30 years ago: stripped me of my self, destroyed my education, and estranged me from my family. I became absolutely the opposite of who I was. It took me years to actually figure it all out and put my life back together.
Six years ago, I used all my be meditation and research skills to make sense of what had happened. Meditation guided me and healed much of the trauma. So, now, after fully understanding what happened, and after coming to terms with the loss and the life that I did not get to live, the destroyed dream of a career, the family that I never had, the experiences that didn’t happen, my relationship with my parents that was lost, I feel at relative peace with it. I’m not yearning for it and trying to figure out how to go back–at the moment anyway–but I do feel like I have some ability to move beyond it now.
I’m sitting here with my lovely husband, and my nice apartment in NYC, and my nice house Upstate in a small town. I am sitting here with the things that I have to work with, which is a lot by most people’s standards, and I’m saying what next. I’m free from the trap of the trauma from the past, what do I want now? Where do I go now? What do I need? Where do I find it? I can live my life now.
I been working at strengthening my body because that will deepen my meditation. So, it’s heal the allergy problem, or whatever grabs my nose and lungs. It’s just finding the right combination to do that. A one stop shop at the local allergist isn’t the way that our health system works, or hasn’t so far. Health is like working up a piece of art, little by little it improves, and not necessarily where you think you need to push it, it’s intuitive. It comes together on its own, just like a meditation practice, or a living practice.
In the past year, I value family in a way that I didn’t. I’ve gone back to a community that was not very good to me. I have to chose how I want to put that into my life in the future. Do I embrace the resources and the roots that I have there, or do I finally break the ties and move on, which is what I have wanted to do for the last 45 years. Do I try to create a family and love? Work was my dream, but those dreams have all but completely faded. That focus in life cannot manifest at this point. It’s too destroyed, and a source of deep pain for me, but I’ve let go by grace and not by choice or through will. I will never get to have what would have made me feel truly alive. I have to chose between the lesser of two evils when it comes to everything, something that I realize is why I have been so stuck, the only reason. So, where do I step, what trajectory do I take?
I guess, I have most profoundly shifted from using analysis and thought to waiting for my mind and my body to make the leap they need to make separate from my willful self, to give me a direction now that I am free from the things that trapped me. It’s that mind or that process that has freed me, and not anything that I have tried to use logic and will to make happen. I feel like maybe, if this process works, that I may be able to bring some of the divinity that I have touched in meditation, and that which might have existed had I been able to live as my true self, back into my life.
Hello Eric – wow where do I begin? Born 10/07/58 with Gemini Rising, Leo Moon. Since around 1991 I have been trying on various hats in the hopes of finding out who I am! I have always been the rebel and have always felt like the outsider. I have been following spirit’s lead and got my massage license, then branched out into metaphysics and worked as a spiritual healer, then attending Barbara Brennan School of Healing which is a 4 year program but I could only attend for 2 years due to my financial situation which I was convinced this is where I needed to be, then acknowledging that I am a medium and putting that out there, then a return to plants and therapeutic grade essential oils which is still being shown to me as part of my path but this year I have been learning more to trust and have faith in my journey and the divine plan in spite of what I am currently experiencing. I was also a care-giver for a friend with Parkinson’s for about the last 6 months and now she is moving to Seattle to be with family which is wonderful for her. Now I’m back to waiting for another sign… On the relationship side, I am connecting with more people which is wonderful because I was also quite isolated from 1997 until this year, probably due to exploring my connection with spirit. I have put my oils business on the web (I love the creative aspect of web design; this is my second side), on facebook, twitter and linked-in and am learning alot from a lot of different people. Of course, my family is concerned and I do my best to stay out of that energy with help from Eckhart Tolle! I also feel that I will be shown the way and I am learning how to follow the yellow brick road again. I am also learning that I feel alot of the collective consciousness and that I must discern what is mine and what is others. Thanks for all you do Eric!
My Libra year: I did it my way!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OzQkX-IZDbQ&NR=1
Recently I have noticed the arrival of Saturn in my sign …Libra Sun, Jupiter…….Scorpio Moon, Mercury and Sagittarius Venus, Mars conjunct. The theme of life for me in the last 12 years has been a very unwelcome isolation….a few weeks back, I was feeling suicidal….not a thing I would normally contemplate or do!! I am a musician ( Pianist as a career) and after retirement( yes I am ‘ old ‘ You write Eric, as though you think the only people ‘ alive and moving’ were born in the 60’s!!!I have news for you!! ) Where was I? …Ah yes, after retirement I turned to Composition. As I was put on the Concert platform rather young ( 17 ), I never went to study in college. This has meant that I must now study orchestration ( which is a complex subject) at this time of life…. 76 . After 4 years of that and financially really stretched to afford a Professor on a very small pension, I have completed two orchestral works. I don’t doubt they will find their way in the world eventually. In 2003, I was working as a Teacher of Piano in an international school and after 3 years, I was sacked for being a Lesbian!! This came to light as I was having a warm and promising friendship with a female member of staff!!! In actual fact I realised that the headmaster was a (‘ cupboard homosexual ) and I was too much in his face!! I sued them for breach of contract….lost the case….went to appeal….lost the appeal!!!! My Lawyer explained the power of money to me!! I lost my house and my children were horrified!! ( yes, I was married for 23 years….have 3 chidren and 4 grandchildren ). There was another potentail relationship but I couldn’t pursue it further because she was 27 years my junior and had a young son… Then about 5 years ago,I met the ‘ideal ‘partner….someone nearer my age and experience……..it was going really welll and then suddenly she withdrew…..I always had the feeling that this wasn;t the end…..So on the relationship front, I am completely hopeless. My father was a scientist inventor who was very ambitious for me….too much!! My Mother was always so jealous!! which I imagine explains it all…..will it ever change? probably not!! About 3 months ago I started having acute panic attacks every night…very unpleasant but I recognised that this was something to do with Saturn edging it’s way towards me in Virgo…incidentally the Cardiologist didn’t agree with that!!! ..BUT since Saturn entered Libra, they are less frequent and I have felt creatively stronger yet still isolated. Also during the last 8 weeks, certain musical opportunities have arisen…..they are developing slowly…much too slowly for my ailing bank account but one must put one’s trust in a feeling that there are important developments ahead…..Of course Saturn in Libra is ‘ exalted’ and I have completely forgotten such a feeling.!! I do hope Saturn will remind me in the next few years. ……
My sun is in Libra, but my ascendant is right on the first degree of Capricorn (now being visited by Pluto). My natal Jupiter is opposing my ascendant, and is in the first degree of Cancer; and I have a Cancer moon, almost exactly square my Sun. I also have the Uranus/Pluto conjunction in mid-Virgo in my natal chart (close to exact)..
Life has been challenging for the past 8-9 years, stemming from events that occurred around late 2000 and 2001; but I’ve had some great moments during this time as well, mostly lately (around 2005 and on). I’m just now starting to see the silver lining to all of it..What doesn’t kill us truly does make us stronger.
This last year has been great, relatively speaking..I somewhat attribute this to the stellium in Aquarius; though I really started noticing a change for the better, and an overall better vibe to my life, since Winter of 2007 and the associated acceleration in the rarer alignments that have been occurring during this time..
I hope this helps, Eric..
Patty! I fell in lust.
Congratulations! Now be sure and let it float you up to the top of your senses (like an infinity-edge pool, but clearer. . .)
kissies,
M
My mother is libra too, and is likewise fading. For awhile I couldn’t see her aura anymore and I thought she would be gone soon. I’m Libra rising. We’ve suffered a lot of family loss this year – too many deaths – tragical deaths. Mother seems to be better since saturn went into Libra, and she found a new doctor too – as did I. Saturn provides structure where it is needed. I’m feeling so much more positve too, and also met two old classmates (hs class of 69) that are libra and libra rising. So anyway, we each have saturn at 29 degrees – bummer. The two I mentioned have lived lives almost identical to mine in the amount of care providing they have had to do for family or spouse. They are both looking at serious life changes for themselves, and making plans, so perhaps this round of saturn (the 2nd return) is the pain that causes change. Always heard that when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of change, you will make the changes needed.
I have plans too – but a weird thing happened in the last two weeks – I fell in lust. That’s the only way to describe it. Must have something to do with mars in Leo trine my mars and venus. I thought I was dead. ha. 58 is great – and having my rising sign progressed to Sagittarius if very freedomish.
I wrote you about my Taurus rising. Libra is my sun sign – in a stellium of mercury-Sun-Neptune-Pallas-south node-Ceres. So . . . March 13 I had an amazing breakthrough – about letting go of hiding and being willing to be “Seen”. I was stuck in writing the book, had been for a while. Had a session with a friend/coach on this issue and the dam burst. Within one day I had taken the book apart and put it back together – and it finally made sense.
In the beginning of July I went to a gathering of women who are initiates in an ancient goddess tradition. It was wonderful in some ways, and awful in others. Many of the women have been attending these gatherings for a long time, and have become ingrained in ways that I do not agree with. There was one woman who I had to deal with who was verbally/emotionally abusive. There was favoritism by/for some of the women. The woman whose home we were at had a sick cat, and I was able to assist the two of them in the process of euthanasia (I am an animal communicator and healer). This woman is one of the leaders, and because of the work I did with her, she gave me respect and made it clear in more recent communications to the group. I am STILL processing all of that.
I also participate in moon ceremonies, and I took on a significant new level of the ceremonies this year. On my birthday I and two other friends had a croning ceremony that was truly magical: before the ceremony three does sat at the top of the back yard (it is a double lot) for about an hour, and later during the ceremony a 4 point buck walked leisurely into the yard and stayed a while and ambled out again. One of my totem animals, the bee, flew around my head and left. The other women had similar manifestations.
I think it was September when I stated to the Universe that I am COMMITTED to being seen and being of service in the world. Business increased quite a lot. Enough that I became busy: the book nearly finished, stalled a couple of months ago.
I have just found a friend online, who lives in the nearest town, about 12 miles away. I will meet her in person tomorrow.
Hope this helps.
I thought it perhaps worthwhile to mention one of my closest friends, a Libra sun, who has gone through a rather serious transition this past year – leaving the man she thought loved her and reclaiming herself; now purchasing a home of her own and resigned (unfortunatly “resigned”) to life being different than she had planned……
My mother too, is Libra sun and fading quickly, a victim of our grand westernmedicine/pharmacutical company BS — the brainfog the legal drug pushers provided being her only “out” to a life of patiarchial abuse/s. Over this past year she has left us – not yet gone physically – but there is no life left, only a shell performing routine/s learned long ago.
xo
After reading the various responses to Libra I am glad to note that others are experiencing the same relationship stuff. Particularly regarding relationships with self and others, erasing the voices of the past and allowing ones soul to breath and become. Dropping the past is a shamanic maneuver (chi gung kung fu) which requires a deep look within, and not be afraid of the shadow self. That has been a process of the past couple years for me, making friends with those ugly monsters that lurk within my mental process and being okay with it.
I look at my defensive reaction to my know it all scorpio boss and realize he is my Chiron mirror, yes I can be a know it all too. However, it is not okay to abused in any shape or form by roommates, parents, or bosses. YETI is correct, it is wise to recognize it for what it is and not let others keep you retreading responses of the past. That would be the maneuver, to deflect and move on. Thank you.
Natal Aq, Asc Libra, Taurus Moon, Pluto going back and forwards over my ic. (and ally angles are at 1deg so kinda of an aries point chart)
Coming to the end (I hope) of a long two or more years of chaos and stress. Mainly to do with family issues – most of which the effect has been to withdraw from most of my contacts with the world due to the attention being paid to family stuff. (Yes and that sounds very selfish but I’m kinda getting to the point with it all where I have very few things left *TO* give up) . Brain has been very mushy for most of the year – I write as a hobby and most of the year I have had words in my head but when I sit down to physically put them onto paper – they just fade away.
Feel as though I’ve been pushed from one bit of chaos into another, often without a chance to draw breath, bit like trying to patch a leak only to find another leak spring up somewhere else. Feel responsible for it all – both the cause of the chaos and the responisibility to fix it at the same time. A bit battered and bashed to be honest.
Had a lot of relatively serious ill health with digestive system – when acutely ill felt that I was not listened to at all (I suspected what turned has out to be right diagnosis from about 2-3 wks in the illness, we’re now 6 months down the line).
No voice, not heard, not understood, not supported – this year has been mentally and physically exhausting and traumatic. But I’m still here, functioning and perhaps on the right path at last…
Yeti tunes in as a representative of Libra rising. This year began with me still recovering from the aftermath of an accidentally started house fire by my roomate while I was out hiking in the summer of 2008 just a couple of days after a lunar eclipse in my 4th house which is why I was living with a verbally abusive alcoholic 23 year old British boy. I was also meeting with my Kung Fu brother Adam on a regular basis to play a game called Pushing Hands that consists of two practitioners of internal martial arts trying to knock each other down and reveal openings in defenses by tapping or hitting just hard enough to feel but not to damage. Since we practice internal martial arts the key to the practice isn’t muscular bulk and hardened desensitized strength but what’s called Nei Gong in Chinese. It’s basically internal awareness.
So these two stories intersect in the experience that resulted in me moving out of that house and into where I am now to escape an abusive relationship. I was falling asleep sometime after midnight when the floor started thumping. I went downstairs and asked drunken boy to please turn down the bass, use headphones, ect. He accused me of lying saying I couldn’t possibly hear it in my room. I lived with a verbally abusive alcoholic when I was a teenager so it was my customary habit to argue with him when he would say stupid things like that. I went upstairs and when the thump started back up I took my Kung Fu stick and tapped it on the floor in time with the music to prove that I could indeed hear it in my room. He came up, threw open my door and charged at me and shoved me then started to yell his head off at me that I couldn’t possibly hear it and I still had my stick in my hands so it would have been all too easy to hit him with it, but then I realized deep in my gut that it’s useless to argue with a drunk person. The retort against his bullshit that began to rise in me dissipated and I just let him yell his head off. When he finally stopped I told him to get the fuck out of my room very quietly. I did apologize later, but that was a new one for me. I’ve never been attacked by a roomate like that before. It was precisely the Pushing Hands practice that gave me the presence of mind to provide no resistance and wait for an opening to banish him from my temple without having to argue or fight. It’s much easier for me to let things drop now, which makes it easier to relax tense muscles. Circular stressful thinking takes its toll on organs and has correspondingly stressful muscle patterns.
Moving here was more verbal abuse for awhile, but it’s settling down, the abusive roomates have moved on. Mostly I’ve been dealing with financial stress by keeping to myself a lot and practicing music and internal alchemy. I’m in the process of recording an album whose songs deal with the struggle to melt the character armor that prevents the smooth flow of Qi and divides the body against itself. Getting near its completion I realize that it conceptually shares something with Pink Floyd’s The Wall which I played so often to have it memorized when I was a teenager. The wall in this case is recognized as the character armor named by Wilhelm Reich which is basically stuck emotions whose storage device is chronically tense, or armored muscles. The album is basically a reflection of my process of undoing by engaging practices that dissolve tension and lead eventually to what’s known as whole body power. Where The Wall leaves you with a broken rock star my process leaves you with some knowledge of how to undo these walls without having to blow them up with violence. Undo yourself before somebody cruel beats you to it. The lyrics also explore the deeper roots of the armor from the left/right mind/body split so prevalent in western thought to religion’s poisoning of sexuality to the exploitation of the lingering emotional effects of the Inquisitions by entertainment media. But it doesn’t leave you there, the music itself is proof that there’s a way out in that I have to emotionally inhabit the state represented by the stage of the album’s story in order to play the part. The parts I sung last month couldn’t have been sung in January because I simply couldn’t make those exact sounds with armored bits still in place. The spacious guitar part couldn’t have been played when I recorded the early tracks. In a voice or an instrument like an electric guitar or fretless electric bass you can hear the shape of a person’s emotions in the quality of the sound.
My day job is full time art student. I began this project under Saturn return. Now Saturn squares my Saturn and I have to graduate next spring. I’m still struggling with the nitty gritty details of what I’m going to do to sustain myself after that. I feel the pull to teach and to bring together a band to bring my music to the people. How to transform music and Kung Fu into a way to make a living is still a mystery to me, but I gotta start learning soon. Seth Godin says you only need 1000 people to survive as an artist. That’s not such a huge percentage of even the 300 or so million Americans let alone the rest of the world. I think the process of Saturn crossing my ascending sign is the call to integrate an adult persona that takes my art seriously enough to make a living drawing upon my experience as an art student in the time of King George and his Aftermath both in and out of the university. It’s important in my view for artists to do work that provides proof of reality outside the maelstrom of corporate manipulations that pretend to be harmless entertainment. Saturn only just got to Libra and isn’t yet here to stay, but I’m getting the feeling that Virgo is playing scales, Libra is playing a show. Libra’s beauty and grace follows Virgo’s practice and self regulation.
I’m a Libra sun with Scorpio Rising and Cancer Moon. It’s been a rich year for me experientially and in terms of coming into my own…and now some challenges resurfacing with familiar themes. These are themes about feeling safe and free enough to take up space and voice my truth, whether it’s in my own home (among housemates), in relationships,etc.
It’s also about feeling my own grace. Lately, I’ve been feeling all internally rolled up, like one of those fruit roll ups from the eighties that you unrolled to eat (though you didn’t have to!). In my fear, my insides, soul self, have rolled up, and now it’s time to unroll and take up space in the personal way I do and feel free within and without.
I might have some more to share at a later time. This is what arises for now.
I also observed an interesting dynamic among me and my core group of friends (six of us, including my ex for purposes of comparison) this year:
The three of us carrying the male energy in our partnerships (myself, Libra; a Leo male and a Cancer female) have been very financially overextended, and very stressed about it (though my stress eased at the beginning of 2009, and moreso after my divorce was final in April).
OTOH, the three carrying the female energy in our partnerships (my ex, a Libra male; a Pisces male and a Sagittarius female) have been unemployed since before the recession, and all three are dealing with chronic illnesses.
I’m Libra sun (Gemini rising, Scorpio Moon).
LOL, my life has been about ALL ABOUT family identity–actually, mostly, rebelling against it. (Natal Pluto, BML and Sun in the 4th). The rebelling part seems odd for 4th/Sun, and strange for an eldest child, too, which I am. Very strange relationship to my parents, and my sisters (Uranus/3rd). My dad was the domineering parent you might expect to see in someone with a 4th house Pluto, and I was a VERY passive-aggressive child. He died during a horrific series of Pluto transits I was having during my puberty and early teen years.
As for more recently… I’ve been through hell the past 2 years, but 2009 has been better now that transiting Saturn has moved away from conjuncting my IC and my 4th house Pluto. But Saturn is still poking (conjunct) my 4th house BML and Sun. I’ve actually experienced a good bit of healing of my relationship with my mom this year, though it came about through me being accusatory (and I had a right to be).
“Going beyond appearances.” Well, let’s be literal about it. My body image has been an issue this year. I had breast reduction surgery back in January. It’s easy to talk about going beyond appearances when others find your appearance generally pleasant, isn’t it? But at least people (men) are talking to my face now instead of my formerly L-cup breasts.
I’ve received significant information in lucid dreams this year.
My occult studies and practice have progressed well.
My mom (Libra) and sisters (Virgo and Cancer) were unusually generous with me several times this year, unprompted, from a material standpoint.
I’ve still got a job, though almost 100 people got laid off around me. I’m grateful… but I’m pushing 50 and I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up. I’m aware that my natal chart is set up for me to be a “late bloomer,” but I’ve been really restless for some time now.
A Seer whom I trust told me I would be moving to the “northeast” at the end of Summer 2010. Here I go again… making a new start a long way from home. I’ve done this twice before: once at age 14, and again at age 28. Also funny is the fact that when I was told about this move, I had been making plans to move to Portland, Oregon—which is *not* northeast of where I live right now. 😀
Suddenly, it seems I may have a tantric partner (Aries Sun/Cap Rising/Aquarius Moon) to play and create with for a few months before I make my big move northeast next year. I’m gaining an identity as a sexual being, and part of me feels great about that… but another part of me is on standby, ready to spoil the party. Thinking that I’m not good enough or attractive enough to receive this. (I’m not Quasimodo or anything like that… maybe it’s my 8th house Saturn?) I sure hope Mr. Aries is willing to go beyond appearances.
Eric, your 2009 midyear horoscope for Libra was profound. Kudos for that. One thing you said in particular—“think of yourself as dropping a deep, strong root into existence. But it also involves something else: making sure that the past is not the basis of the future.” Yes. My new thing can’t be, and won’t be, about what my family of origin wants, or values, or respects. *It never is.* I know this, and so do they. This is a well-worn groove for us.
I feel I’ve “offered up” so much the past couple of years, and dealt with a world of pain that accumulated over the past 14 years. Now I’m standing at the crossroads again, waiting for Hecate to show up.
I’m not too surprised that we Virgos haven’t said much. I don’t tend to like to talk about myself, it always seems beside the point, when there’s so much else to be done in the world. Anyway, I’m a Virgo + Virgo rising. I also have my moon at 0 degrees Leo, where something big happened this summer (was it an eclipse, I can’t remember… brain fog).
Anyway, the past year or two has been challenging, of course. The hardest part, aside from the significant money issues has been a matter of having my “identity” repeatedly torn away from me. My dream career blew up in my face. We moved from my dream location, back to an area I left a decade earlier. No longer homeowners, due to the transition. Hardest of all was leaving my Sangha. I’m a Buddhist, and I finally found my dream Sangha, then came to an area where it just didn’t exist, and I’m trying to find my religious place once again. You will have noticed I said the word “dream” a lot. I don’t know why…
Re: my moon, I do remember someone saying on this site this past summer that 0 degrees Leo is like mom not being available and dad not arriving yet, or something. That is the best summation of my childhood ever. My mom is a paranoid schizophrenic; my dad is a big kid, in the sense of not being into parenting.
Much thanks, Eric and company. I’ve enjoyed lurking for a few years now, so am now coming out, so to speak.
Love to all,
-d.
All this year, beginning around Christmas of 2008 I began to establish my identity as an artist. Since my Chiron return a couple years ago, I realized that I had to put the voices of the past (conservative parents and others) to rest-not allow the “No you can’t” cripple my outward identity (Chiron is in my 1st house). This year I built a web site, which includes my art gallery and had 3 art shows, one of which was solo.
Saturn has always been a workhorse for me-all by itself in the 10th house Scorpio, square Jupiter and Pluto in the 8th house, Leo. I want to expand and explore but gotta work for it-which has always been a frustration for me. Particularly when I want to be recognized by the outside world. I have been acutely aware that Saturn was entering Libra on October 29, where my Mars sits on the Aries point. Saturn will also transit 4 other planets in Libra. Yikes!
On Thursday, Oct.29 in the afternoon, I felt the shift big time, at work with one of my bosses. He is a Scorpio, and really wants to make sure I know he is in control-even to the point of belittling me. I see this as Saturn curbing my Mars energy. I know that the next 30 months with the Saturn transit will be tough and very challenging but if I work it out, I hope to come out on the other end reborn so to speak.
When Saturn squares Pluto-geez-Pluto is heading towards a conjunction with my Capricorn ascendent, which is exact in 2012. I am glad I’m a tough old broad…who knows what that will bring.
Mostly this year and the one ahead will be about me giving voice and expression to my artist soul. Narrowing my focus and concentrating my energy on the most important areas of my life; art and relationships. Saturn will make sure I do that or whack me upside the head.