Note for Robin

 

March 3, 2006

 

http://cainer.com/ericfrancis/mar3.html

 

Dear Eric:

 

After reading the latest email from Robin this morning, I just had to write. My third child was injured on two separate occasions, in two hospitals, at three months of age by being given two separate drug overdoses.

 

We were living in Chicago at the time, and it was a HORRENDOUS experience. We were also lucky. We had someone at whom to point the finger of blame, and my son is now 20 years old and has a devoted team of nurses who care for him at home. But, he will never ever be able to do the things that others do: he is unable to walk, speak in language, sit up, see or do very much. He requires 24 hour care for everything.

 

My son's injury has affected his siblings and parents in a way that others have difficulty comprehending. I've been divorced twice, and my other children have had to deal with the near death of their sibling and the divorce of their parents under awful circumstances. What I would like to say to Robin is this: we all make decisions based on the information available to us at the time.

 

Having lived with a handicapped son who HAS resources for his care, and having seen other families who do NOT have such resources, I need to say to her that these kinds of events can tear families apart. I know that it may sound cold, but those docs in LA were probably right. I've lived with this every day for twenty years and one never stops grieving. At best, one comes to acceptance. "God never gives you more than you can handle?" Well, God must really think a LOT of me! And, of Robin! I think that Robin needs to find it in herself to forgive herself for choosing her husband and other children upon the advice of a doctor and for choosing the way and time and place that she decided to live.

 

None of us is completely perfect and hindsight is always 20-20. Also, since I believe that these kinds of events are tied up with karmic debt and spiritual evolution, I would say to her that the way she chooses to handle this will make a big difference down the road. But all of that is self-evident. I certainly wish her the very best in coming to terms with an event that has clearly made a great deal of difference in her life.

 

I send her my deepest feelings and hope that she can find meaning in this tragedy and can somehow heal. For myself, I have found it interesting that Saturn was sitting on my ascendant at the time when my son was born.