{"id":75417,"date":"2014-04-01T00:00:36","date_gmt":"2014-04-01T04:00:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/planetwaves.net\/news\/?p=75417"},"modified":"2014-04-01T00:02:45","modified_gmt":"2014-04-01T04:02:45","slug":"pluto-is-lighting-a-fire-under-uranus","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/planetwaves.net\/news\/breaking-news\/pluto-is-lighting-a-fire-under-uranus\/","title":{"rendered":"Pluto, Lighting a Fire Under Uranus in Libra"},"content":{"rendered":"

We at Planet Waves have become dissatisfied with the rate of progress of the Uranus-Pluto square. Where is the revolution? Where are the upheavals and jolts of rebirth of our society? Where are the pangs of freedom? Where’s the party? So far, all we’ve got back for our collective efforts has been a fizzled out Occupy, and a few videos from Anonymous and the iPhone 5.<\/p>\n

\"Let's<\/a>
Let’s get right to the point — Uranus conjunct Pluto in 2221.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Question — did Sunday\u2019s Aries New Moon, ruled by Mars, feel a little \u2018different\u2019 to you? Upon further analysis of the retrograde that Mars is making through Libra, it’s clear that the planet representing maleness is going to go so far backwards into this sign ruled by Venus that Mars will actually invert itself, emerging on May 19 as the first transgendered planet.<\/p>\n

Okay, so, we admit, that is something. We’re doing awesome on transgendered rights. Queers can get married lots of places and you can smoke a joint in Denver and not get arrested. <\/p>\n

That’s all very Uranus-Pluto, but is that all we get? What’s taking everyone so long to wake up? Why is Monsanto still conquering the world? “American Spring” is about to come out as a Victoria’s Secret ad campaign. <\/p>\n

We’ve decided that the current astrology is not powerful enough. Plus, everyone is bored with it already. So we’re skipping ahead to the Uranus-Pluto conjunction of 2221. Yes, we could have gone to the Uranus-Pluto opposition, or the conjunction of 2104, but that one is in Taurus, and it will take too long to have an effect. Yes, it will be pretty and might actually feel good. But it will be conjunct Eris and it might be really confusing. Plus there will be a Moon-Venus conjunction in Aries and everyone else’s revolution will sound better than your own. <\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Mars in Leo is square the conjunction and everyone will want to be boss and say, “Hey look how evolved I am!” and the cult of Change Feels Good will buckle under the weight of its own hubris and hedonism, and drag on forever.<\/p>\n

So we’re not taking any chances. <\/p>\n

From now on, we will begin counting astrology from the Uranus-Pluto conjunction in Libra, which happens in 2221. Libra is an air sign. That ought to move things along a little more efficiently. Sure, Libra can never make up its mind, but it loves to tie up the loose ends and does well with a boss. That would be Pluto.<\/p>\n

The first thing that will happen under the Libra conjunction will be that the Supreme Court will declare that the only entities that can get married to one another are corporations. According to the chart, the decision will declare all people single. While they can stay in their relationships if they want, they will be legally compelled to be individuals.<\/p>\n

This whole “I am not a person without another person” thing will finally blow up. Also the asteroid (57631) Cheaper will be conjunct the asteroid (64533) Rent, which will make it easier to be yourself. This is the change that will shock the world to its senses.<\/p>\n

The next two Uranus-Pluto conjunctions will be in Venus-ruled signs: the planets are trying to send a message. The Uranus-Pluto conjunction of the Sixties was in Virgo; yes, the Beatles said “all you need is love,” but all they did was work. Now, Venus is going to grow a pair. She’s sick of waiting for someone to reinvent the orgasm.<\/p>\n

So let’s get this revolution started. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We at Planet Waves have become dissatisfied with the rate of progress of the Uranus-Pluto square. Where is the revolution? Where are the upheavals and jolts of rebirth of our society? Where are the pangs of freedom? Where’s the party? So far, all we’ve got back for our collective efforts has been a fizzled out … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7221,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"generate_page_header":""},"categories":[1743],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/planetwaves.net\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/75417"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/planetwaves.net\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/planetwaves.net\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/planetwaves.net\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/7221"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/planetwaves.net\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=75417"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/planetwaves.net\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/75417\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/planetwaves.net\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=75417"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/planetwaves.net\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=75417"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/planetwaves.net\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=75417"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}